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Newest Member: Mercedes66 (46046)

User Topic: Waiting for my life
devistatedmom
♀ 24961
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 1:43 PM, April 12th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's how I feel again lately. I'm waiting for something to happen. The bad keeps coming, I'm waiting for something good.

I'm 5 years out from Dday in a few weeks. I feel like I'm no further ahead than I was then. This has nothing to do with pining away after him, I'm not. It's just that anything I try to do to make a new life for myself doesn't work. I've hit the why bother stage, while being frustrated that nothing good is happening.

I've rewritten this 3 times now, as it keeps getting too long. Too whiny.

My friend/neighbor said it well the other day. "DM, you are a good person. You are always willing to help others, do whatever needs to be done for your kids, for friends, even strangers. Why can't you catch a break?" I don't know. I really, really don't know. It's hard to stay optimistic and positive when the good part keeps evading you. Even asking others for help with certain things blows up on me.

I'm broke, tired, bored, stressed, you name it, I'm it. Just wish something I try to do to make my life better would actually work for a change, you know?


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5633 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
norabird
♀ 42092
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 6:25 PM, April 12th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't want to offer any platitudes, but you have been heard.

I do think your life will open up for you. Maybe if you can step back from the effort you have been making for a moment you would at least enjoy the relief of the pressure to always be striving? Though I understand that when you want your situation to change you desire to be proactive about it with good cause, continuing to beat your head against the wall right now may only hurt. Can you take a day, a week, two week's vacation from struggling to improve things? It might allow your stress time to dissolve and lessen.

I am sorry it has been hard.

((((devistatedmom))))


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4235 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
inconnu
♀ 24518
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 6:25 PM, April 12th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((dm))) it really sucks that the bad stuff in life keeps happening. sending strength and mojo that something good happens for you, soon.


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12187 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
MyVoice
♀ 35695
Member # 35695
Default  Posted: 6:47 PM, April 12th (Saturday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You know what being a good person is an awesome place to be,look at all the drop kicks in the world and know you have a huge head start on a good life.

Like norabird says

Maybe if you can step back from the effort you have been making
perhaps concentrate on little happys for a while, cooking a great meal, going for a long walk, watch an old movie with popcorn and ice cream, eat jelly crystals from a packet, buy a sketch book and start keeping a visual diary... I don't know just enjoy living and being you, don't miss out on all the simple joys because you're waiting for 'something' to happen.

Easier to say than do... I know. Hope you feel better soon xxx


Me:BW 46, Him:WH 50
two kids DD14 and DS17
Married 26 years
OW 28, crew member (he was the ships captain)
"People are formed by their actions, not their ideals" unknown

Posts: 480 | Registered: May 2012 | From: Australia
gotmylifeback
♂ 32693
Member # 32693
Default  Posted: 2:51 AM, April 14th (Monday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((devistatedmom))

Im sorry you are struggling. I just posted about how I was feeling stuck and and frustrated despite having many things to be thankful for.

There are so many things that are not fair; especially when we are the BS. I dont have any great words of wisdom but I want you to know thwt you have been heard. Keep moving forward and focusing on yourself and your family.


Her-Unremorseful, Wayward ex wife
Me-No longer a betrayed husband

Happily remarried.

"You are what you do. A man is defined by his actions, not his memory." - Kuato in Total Recall


Posts: 598 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: between Oz and Wonderland
Topic Posts: 5

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