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child custody investigation..and more

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Leia posted 4/15/2014 16:45 PM

Has anyone been involved in a child custody investigation? I have my first appointment with one tomorrow. I talked to my L and have gotten the documents that I need together. (aside, my L told me to smile more....not sure how to take that....) I'm really nervous and would appreciate some pointers. The thing about us is that he isn't a bad dad. I've read the horrors some others have been involved in here on SI, and while he's cheating scum and a rat bastard, he's always been good to the kids. Thanks for listening.

devistatedmom posted 4/15/2014 17:37 PM

I know many here have had this done. I'm sure they will be along soon. Just wanted you to know you have been heard, and bump it back up for you for replies!

Just take a deep breath. Be truthful. You can do this.

Nature_Girl posted 4/15/2014 17:40 PM

Do you mean a parenting evaluation? If he's a good dad, why is any investigation or evaluation being done at all?

Leia posted 4/15/2014 19:39 PM

Because he has a job (currently) that involves a lot of travel (where he met his AP). And I don't think yanking the kids between houses every other week is good for them. Apparently, it is pretty common in our county.

Catwoman posted 4/16/2014 04:23 AM

How old are the children? I know folks with older kids that find this an effective arrangement. I don't think it's good for the younger set, though.

Can he and does he schedule his travel around the kids' schedule? If not, I wouldn't do the 50/50 because you cannot be counted on him to take his week and you will likely be picking up the slack.

My ex traveled a great deal, so I got primary physical and joint legal AND he had to give me a minimum of 48 hours' notice when he could not take his parenting time. Perhaps something like that is helpful to you.

If he's not a bad father, why the evaluation?


ChoosingHope posted 4/17/2014 00:32 AM

I did a nine-month custody eval. I don't think it's necessary for you to do one, given your situation. Who recommended it?

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