Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Sunflower96

Off Topic :
I got tenure!!!

This Topic is Archived
default

 Blobette (original poster member #36519) posted at 2:28 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Only you guys will appreciate how hard it is to keep focus and produce at work with all of this crap going on in my personal life. For those of you who aren't familiar with the academic world, tenure involves 6 years of hard work to prove yourself. In the last year, your peers (professors from other universities, professors from your own university) review your work and decide whether you're worthy or not. Students weigh in. Everyone gives an opinion, and it's a very public thing. There are seven levels of review. (Really.)

While I was on the tenure track, no only did I have to deal with a cheating husband, I had a special needs kid (my DD didn't walk until 3 and had an ASD diagnosis -- basically, was seriously delayed in many ways), a husband who traveled a lot for work, a husband who was unemployed for 2 years, my parents' house burned down and my dad had a stroke that left him disabled and eventually killed him, my mom had open heart surgery... and lots more.

So I think I can brag a little here and say that I'm pretty damn proud of myself for being able to do a good job despite all of this. And that I've had enough stress in the last few years to last quite a while... So, please, universe, can this be the start of a slightly more fun stage?

BS (me): 51
WS: 52
Married: 27 yrs
Kids: 2
OW: Co-worker, 7 yr LTA
DD 8/1/2012, Working on R

posts: 1064   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2012
id 6762814
default

Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 2:30 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Woot! Awesome news!

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 6762817
default

FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 2:32 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Tenure is becoming more and more difficult to get, so you're golden.

I'm so impressed, that is awesome!

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

posts: 21594   ·   registered: Jul. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6762818
default

sad12008 ( member #18179) posted at 2:34 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

That is so awesome, Blobette!!!!

Hooray for you! Hearty congratulations...I'm familiar with how difficult achieving tenure is, understand the infidelity impact on life, and have an ASD child as well, so I truly think you have massive rights to brag WTG!

You can't fill a cup with no bottom.

posts: 4280   ·   registered: Feb. 13th, 2008   ·   location: a new start together
id 6762825
default

SisterMilkshake ( member #30024) posted at 2:40 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Congrats, Blobette. That is so awesome and totally deserved. I hope you are very proud of yourself.

BW (me) & FWH both over half a century; married several decades; children
d-day 3/10; LTA (7 years?)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak." ~ Homer Simpson

posts: 15429   ·   registered: Nov. 5th, 2010   ·   location: The Great White North USA
id 6762831
default

tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 2:41 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Congrats!!!!

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6762834
default

LydiaE ( member #42571) posted at 2:41 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Good for you! What an accomplishment!

posts: 136   ·   registered: Feb. 24th, 2014   ·   location: SouthernUSA
id 6762835
default

lost_in_toronto ( member #25395) posted at 2:44 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

That is an impressive accomplishment! Congratulations!

Me: BS/48
Him: WS/46
DDay: August 23, 2009
Together 23 years.
Reconciled.

posts: 1806   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2009   ·   location: not toronto anymore
id 6762838
default

 Blobette (original poster member #36519) posted at 2:47 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Thanks, guys. I feel very lucky in that the perfect job for someone of my background came up -- I didn't have a typical academic career, but was able to transition into an academic job anyway. And in my field there are quite a lot of non-TT positions, where you have to raise your own money through grants etc, so I was very lucky to have gotten a job where my salary is guaranteed and any extra money I raise is gravy. (Although the university puts a lot of pressure on people to get those, and that's the next stage of my career.) Bottom line, I am indeed lucky to have found the "perfect" job for someone like me.

BS (me): 51
WS: 52
Married: 27 yrs
Kids: 2
OW: Co-worker, 7 yr LTA
DD 8/1/2012, Working on R

posts: 1064   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2012
id 6762842
default

Teach8 ( member #36521) posted at 2:50 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Congrats. Such a wonderful accomplishment. :)

Me: BW. Him: WH. Dday: 4/26/12. TT until 8/15/12 LTA 7 years. Trying to R

posts: 595   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2012
id 6762846
default

She11ybeanz ( member #27457) posted at 3:15 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

WOW! You GO!!!! What an amazing accomplishment!

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

posts: 2767   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2010   ·   location: Virginia
id 6762899
default

justasinger ( member #43031) posted at 3:18 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

That is truly awesome. Congrats to you...

BSO -me 38
WSO - her 30
2x DD ages 6 and 4
D-day #1 APR08 (supposed ONS w/OM)
D-day #2 1JAN13 2x ONS w/OM and OW, and a ONS
D-day #3 22APR14 (admitted to another ONS that she didn't fess up to during DDay #2)

posts: 164   ·   registered: Apr. 7th, 2014   ·   location: New England
id 6762902
default

Pentup ( member #20563) posted at 3:43 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Picture the hand clapping emoticon. You go Blobette!!

Me- BS
Him- FWS (I hope- F)

posts: 8410   ·   registered: Aug. 8th, 2008   ·   location: Not Oz
id 6762939
default

nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 4:07 PM on Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Congratulations! What a huge accomplishment, Blobette!

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6762976
default

Lionne ( member #25560) posted at 2:33 AM on Friday, April 18th, 2014

Wonderful news! Great opportunities for you to enjoy your career with one less thing to stress over!

Me-BS-71 in May HIM-SAFWH-74 I just wanted a normal life.Normal trauma would have been appreciated.

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Sep. 18th, 2009   ·   location: In my head
id 6763763
default

cayc ( member #21964) posted at 2:44 AM on Friday, April 18th, 2014

good for you!

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Dec. 8th, 2008   ·   location: Mexico
id 6763777
default

Gottagetthrough ( member #27325) posted at 5:31 AM on Friday, April 18th, 2014

Awesome!! My dream is to go back and get a PhD and teach...

Enjoy this accomplishment, it is HUGE!

posts: 3843   ·   registered: Jan. 22nd, 2010
id 6763903
default

Chrysalis123 ( member #27148) posted at 5:43 AM on Friday, April 18th, 2014

WoW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver

Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie

posts: 6709   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2010
id 6763911
default

purplejacket4 ( member #34262) posted at 5:54 AM on Friday, April 18th, 2014

Congrats!!!

I know more than most what you put in to get that. You are AWESOME!!!

Me: BS 50
Her: FWS 53 (both family med MDs; together 23 years)
OW: who cares (PhD)
Dday: 10/11: 11/11 TT for months; NC 8/12
Limboconsiliationish
"band aids don't fix bullet holes" Taylor Swift
I NEVER mind medical ???

posts: 3013   ·   registered: Dec. 20th, 2011   ·   location: Here
id 6763924
default

itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 5:21 PM on Friday, April 18th, 2014

Congratulations!!!!!!

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2011   ·   location: NWPA
id 6764432
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy