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Newest Member: chachapoppyseed (45751)

User Topic: Update on "I'm having a hard time keeping it together..."
dmari
♀ 37215
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 5:24 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

To pinkyxo, PurpleRose and Tesla,
I did not thank you properly on my previous thread and want to do so now. Thank you so much for listening and for the hugs!!

Update: My son almost committed suicide today. He walked away from the school and was about to jump off the bridge which is an overpass to the main freeway. He wrote a suicide note in his iPhone. Then thank God he called the suicide hotline who then called me.

He is in the psych unit. Because he is 15, I had to inform stbx which I did when I got home via email. I am praying that stbx does not make this situation harder for my son or me.

When it rains, it pours.


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2303 | Registered: Oct 2012
PurpleRose
♀ 33129
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 5:31 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh honey- I am so sorry.

I hope he can get the help he needs to work through his pain. :( I cannot even image how scary that must be for you. Sending love and strength...


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3631 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
kg201
♂ 40173
Member # 40173
Default  Posted: 5:32 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry dmari. This is so hard. Just be ready for your ex making this about himself. Think ahead to how you want to respond if he does.

((dmari))


Me: BH, 39
Her: WW, 40
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, ongoing
Dday: 7/28/13
Divorcing, 3 children
---------------------------------
"There can be no friendship without confidence, and no confidence without integrity." -S

Posts: 776 | Registered: Aug 2013
dmari
♀ 37215
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 5:51 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

PurpleRose: thank you again. I pray that he will get the help he so desperately is screaming for too.

kg201: Thank you so much for your kindness. Just be ready for your ex making this about himself. Think ahead to how you want to respond if he does. I haven't thought of how to respond ... I'm kinda just praying he doesn't do anything to make it worse.


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2303 | Registered: Oct 2012
hexed
♀ 19258
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 5:51 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((dmari))

I am soooooooo glad he called. Thank goodness he reached out so people, especially you can help.

I hope and pray your X is not ass about this. The good news is the pysch people can keep him away if he upsets your son too much.

How are you? I know your DS is the #1 priority but you were already having it tough. Do you have any IRL support helping you right now? Its OK to take a moment and not keep it together. You're going through a lot.

Lots of ((((dmari)))) healing thoughts for all of you.


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8490 | Registered: Apr 2008
SBB
♀ 35229
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 5:52 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((dmari & DS))

I just can't imagine. My mamma heart breaks with yours.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5660 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
nekorb
♀ 40306
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 6:18 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((dmari)))

I am so, so sorry. I've sent you a PM.

One hour at a time at this point. Sleep. Eat. DS is in a safe place.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
norabird
♀ 42092
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 7:40 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How awful for your DS and for you, I am so sorry! Try and lean on someone IRL and be good to yourself. It's a heavy burden to fear for your child. Sending you some strength and peace.

Having such a loving and dependable mom who he knows he can trust must really help him at this time, I hope you can take some pride in that.

(((((Dmari DS))))


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4203 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Klove
♀ 42096
Member # 42096
Default  Posted: 8:03 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending hugs and prayers your way...


"But stand still is all I did
Love like ours is never fixed
Still I stuck around
I did behave
I saved you every time
I was a fool for love
I was a fool for love"

Posts: 294 | Registered: Jan 2014
Caretaker1
♂ 42777
Member # 42777
Default  Posted: 8:45 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is awful and just another example the ripple effects divorce has on families. My prayers for peace and comfort to you and your family. I also pray your ex does not respond in a manner described on this post. In times like these, the hope is everyone distinguishes what is happening and compassion and empathy and love lead the way. Please keep us posted.

[This message edited by Caretaker1 at 8:46 AM, April 18th (Friday)]


Posts: 234 | Registered: Mar 2014
Chrysalis123
♀ 27148
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 8:52 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Dmari and son))))))


Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well. 

Posts: 2781 | Registered: Jan 2010
jackie89
♀ 38271
Member # 38271
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((( damari))) my heart is breaking for you.

I will keep your son and your family in my prayers.
Tough week at SI!


Separated/divorcing

"The Secret of Change is to focus all your energy - not on fighting the old, but on building the new" ~~Lori Greiner FB post~~


Posts: 531 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Pennsylvania
deena
♀ 27275
Member # 27275
Default  Posted: 9:37 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That is so awful.

I am so glad it had the better outcome!!

Please take care dmari and son.


Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's
better to leave them broken than to hurt
yourself putting it back together.


Posts: 3139 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Canada
devistatedmom
♀ 24961
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 9:40 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh Dmari, I'm so sorry. I hope the hospital is able to help him, and I hope he is strong enough to ask them to keep his dad out if in your son's mind he is one of the major stressors. May you all get the help you need.

{{{hugs}}}


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5588 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
Getting to Happy
♀ 35200
Member # 35200
Default  Posted: 9:55 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((Dmari & DS)))))))


WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...

Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown


Posts: 1145 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: La La Land
gonnabe2016
♀ 34823
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 10:26 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

{{{dmari and littles}}}


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 8187 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Pinkyxo
♀ 43095
Member # 43095
Default  Posted: 10:42 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((dmari & ds)) I'm so sorry to read this. Thank God he reached out for help.
Sending you strength and continued prayers.


One foot in front of the other

Posts: 30 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: Florida :)
nowiknow23
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:01 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, honey. ((((((dmari & ds))))))) I'm so very glad he reached out and called the hotline. Poor guy must be in a lot of pain to have considered suicide. He is in the best possible place to get help, and the hospital may have support services available for you and your family as well. Something to consider. I know the social worker at the psych unit my DD was admitted to was a great help for us.

Sending you strength, hon. When it pours, you really need to focus on taking care of yourself. Eat. Sleep. Water. Hang in there.


You can call me NIK

"Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you."
-Walt Whitman


Posts: 26198 | Registered: Aug 2011
caregiver9000
♀ 28622
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 11:40 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((dmari))))

I hope he has landed in a good place and that you are able to take a moment to fall apart. Super huge hugs and support.

It takes so much energy to hold it together...


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5912 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
yestopants
♀ 41631
Member # 41631
Default  Posted: 11:48 AM, April 18th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((dmari and DS))


Me: 35
STBXWH: 38
2 amazing kids DS DD
almost Divorced!

Posts: 286 | Registered: Dec 2013
Topic Posts: 34
Pages: 1 · 2

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