X is happily married oh so he says. He has now for almost a year now and ever since he met this girl he has been claiming she is pregnant. Well it finally came true. They had their baby shower 2 weekends ago wich he managed to ruin becouse of his drinking. But thats another crazy story.
On monday mi daughter called me to inform me that they where at the hospital expecting the baby, but things
weren't moving along so it seemed like he would be born tuesday the 22. I didnt realize it at the moment but DD made sure I knew "Mom!!! If he is born tomorrow it will be your bday!!" I couldnt help but yell "No!!!" I could feel the emotion come on but couldnt make out what I was really feeling was I mad was I secretly happy. I felt guilty for feeling any certain way its a baby he is innocent in all of this. I couldnt be mad, but I threw my fit I yelled and
ranted...not to daughter. Her and I just laughed it off.
I couldnt stop thinking about it...why? why on my birthday?? Was I paying for something?? No!!! This wasnt about me. Its his cross to bare now he will never ever be able to forget about MY birthday everytime he celebrates somehow he will be thinking about me and reminded of everything he did and how much he lost. Even if thats not really the case thats what helps me deal with this.
How does this A take away everything from me all our years spent all the hardwork my tranquility and now my birthday!! Now also take into consideration he even took a name I was hoping to use for my son...Dominique. I had suggested that name for my son but then X didnt like it. He couldnt see his son named that He doesnt speak english very well and I feel like he couldnt say it as it should
but ok lets pick another name. Now he loves the name enough to name his younger son Dominique???! The now mom speaks no english and well he hasnt improved his, but go figure they just love the name. Lol. I dont think she knows all this so shame on him
Maybe Im just being a drama queen about. But It bothered me however God works in mysterious ways!
[This message edited by APRIL2008 at 4:55 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday)]
“Was it hard?" I ask.
Not as hard as holding on to something that wasn't real.”
― Lisa Schroeder