All these times he has been cheating and I've forgiven. I always made excuses like; he's best friend betrayed him so maybe that's why he did it, or he works so hard and maybe I didn't give enough attention, or the death in the family made him depressed that's why..... But you know what? He did it cause he is a cheating lying bastard that has manipulated me into only being concerned for how he feels.
I have taken a step back these last few weeks since I found he is texting his little slut again from 2 years ago and he said he just needed a friend to confide in. F that such BS. It makes me feel like crap and I am finally looking at how all this makes me feel and has made me feel. It has infested itself so deep that I rarely laugh it smile anymore. I am on my way to changing this hold he has over me. F how he feels.... It's about me now and how it has made me feel
I am so glad I have found a counselor that worked with me to find out these things on my own.