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AlexFL (original poster member #40966) posted at 12:46 AM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
All these times he has been cheating and I've forgiven. I always made excuses like; he's best friend betrayed him so maybe that's why he did it, or he works so hard and maybe I didn't give enough attention, or the death in the family made him depressed that's why..... But you know what? He did it cause he is a cheating lying bastard that has manipulated me into only being concerned for how he feels.
I have taken a step back these last few weeks since I found he is texting his little slut again from 2 years ago and he said he just needed a friend to confide in. F that such BS. It makes me feel like crap and I am finally looking at how all this makes me feel and has made me feel. It has infested itself so deep that I rarely laugh it smile anymore. I am on my way to changing this hold he has over me. F how he feels.... It's about me now and how it has made me feel
I am so glad I have found a counselor that worked with me to find out these things on my own.
catlover50 ( member #37154) posted at 1:00 AM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
Good for you. Sounds well past time for you to get mad and start taking care of yourself.
Best of luck.
Dday -9/23/2012
Reconciled
Chinadoll30 ( member #43131) posted at 1:23 AM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
Good for you! He's not looking out for you, so I'm glad you'll look out for yourself!
"We must see all scars as beauty. Okay? This will be our secret. Because take it from me, a scar does not form on the dying. A scar means 'I survived'." -Chris Cleave
norabird ( member #42092) posted at 1:56 AM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
I'm glad you're finding your bitch boots. It's time he got called on his selfishness and disregard for you. You deserve better and you deserve to make your needs a priority. He is n adult and made choices--there are consequences for that, and it's not your job as his victim to make his excuses or protect him.
Stay strong honey.
Crushed1 ( member #6449) posted at 4:08 AM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
(((AlexFL))) I also made tons of excuses for my H at first but when the realization came that *he did it because he wanted to* I started seeing the truth of 'why'. Because they're on a thoughtless, selfish EGO trip that's all about them.
So often we BS's get so caught up in our spouse's A's that we forget all about ourselves and our own needs. So I'm glad you're taking care of YOU! Make YOU your number one priority from here on! You deserve the best and he's not giving you that.
~~"You can't run away from yourself"!!! Me to my H when he descended into adultery insanity.
~~Prov.15:13 "By sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken"
~~"The day breaks-your mind aches"
~STRENGTH~PEACE~HOPE~FAITH
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 1:13 PM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
((((Alex))))
This is why 180 is such an effective tool for the BS, it helps them to find center again. It makes one realize who is truly important, and allows you to start finding your strength.
You do not deserve this, none of us did. You are strong, smart and capable. You deserve more....
However you are the only one who can get more....
Time to stand up and get it.
((((and strength))))
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
1Faith ( member #38975) posted at 11:29 PM on Thursday, April 24th, 2014
Congrats !!
You have taken some power back.
There is never an excuse to cheat. Ever.
Define what it is you want and live by it.
If he can or won't be there and understand then you have your answer.
Don't settle. You deserve honesty and truth !!
Sometimes my life feels like a test I didn't study for
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