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she moved out two weeks ago

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Midas posted 4/23/2014 20:00 PM

So an update on my situation. My STBXWW moved out two weeks ago, last week the OM ended up back in jail for violating probation when he PO caught him with my STBXWW. (Due to the fact that he is a sex offender, he has to inform his PO of all relationships with women especially if they have children. Which he didn't do.) Turns out he was also sleeping with three other women, so my STBXWW doesn't want anything to do with him anymore.

So yay,I don't have to worry about that relationship anymore coming back to dump more bullshit on me in the future. Tested clean in February for all STDs, going to go get tested again in a few months hopefully everything comes back clean again, but I'm starting to worry that it won't. She is experiencing symptoms of herpes, while I have't noticed anything on me.

In my life, I took a motorcycle safety course and got my motorcycle license and then got a motorcycle. Brand new leftover 2012 Honda Shadow 750, awesome deal on it too. I went out riding with my father last weekend and it was exhilarating and a great bonding experience. I don't miss my STBXWW all that much, I miss how she made me feel when I thought she loved me, but I don't miss HER. I'm living good while she struggles to pay her bills even with my child support payments.

I have to say I spend most of my days happy now. However there are a few days where I just don't feel like getting out of bed, not sad, just too tired. Being a single parent even part time is harder work than being a parent in a marriage, but I'm getting better at it.

[This message edited by Midas at 8:01 PM, April 23rd (Wednesday)]

justinpaintoday posted 4/23/2014 20:12 PM

Good for you brother....mine moves out in a couple weeks and truthfully look forward to being able to detach and finish healing.

norabird posted 4/23/2014 20:28 PM

Congrats on the bike Midas. I'm sorry there is still fallout from your STBXWW but you seem to be getting into a very healthy place. Good for you! You deserve it.

sunsetslost posted 4/23/2014 23:22 PM

Great update Midas. Keep fighting the fight. The rewards will come.

SBB posted 4/24/2014 07:11 AM

Now that she's out of your space you're no longer in survival mode so your body/mind will go through a few transitions.

Keep reclaiming your space and your life. It has been a very long road for his friend - you're through the roughest parts. The rest is adjustment and rebuilding.

You'll find your groove soon enough.

PhantomLimb posted 4/24/2014 07:16 AM

I very much relate to these two statements:

I don't miss my STBXWW all that much, I miss how she made me feel when I thought she loved me, but I don't miss HER.

I have to say I spend most of my days happy now. However there are a few days where I just don't feel like getting out of bed, not sad, just too tired.

It sounds like you are healing really thoroughly and well and putting your life back together. Even allowing yourself the recognition that sometimes you can still have a bad moment or just feel tired seems like a major thing to me-- you are letting yourself feel whatever you have to feel and owning it and moving on.

((hugs))

Keep doing everything you're doing!

allatsea posted 4/25/2014 06:08 AM

Being a single parent even part time is harder work than being a parent in a marriage, but I'm getting better at it.

I relate to this. I give my all when I'm with the children. I'm being mummy and daddy to them whilst also helping them through everything she did to them.

I'm a better dad now than I was in marriage.

Midas posted 4/26/2014 16:57 PM

Found out today, I and my soon to be ex have herpes. Wonderful!

I have only ever had sex with one person and now I have an STD.

[This message edited by Midas at 4:59 PM, April 26th (Saturday)]

justinpaintoday posted 4/26/2014 17:02 PM

Dude sorry to hear that. Stay strong. I think they have medicine to control that.

SBB posted 4/26/2014 17:50 PM

I'm so sorry Midas. That is awful, just awful.

The sad clown passed it to me too. A few months after we met we both went I and got tested, I went on the pill and we stopped using condoms.

About 6m later we were living together and he confesses he has HSV1. I can't believe I didn't kick him to the curb back then. He didn't tell me and allowed me to expose myself. He had had blisters in the early days but told me it was friction.

5 years later I had my first blister at 7m pregnant. I've only had 3 since then (so in 6 years).

The difficult part is informing new partners. I've been very open and upfront but I can't say I'm not angry that I have something to tell them.

You're going to be OK.

Nature_Girl posted 4/26/2014 19:32 PM

last week the OM ended up back in jail for violating probation when he PO caught him with my STBXWW. (Due to the fact that he is a sex offender, he has to inform his PO of all relationships with women especially if they have children. Which he didn't do.) Turns out he was also sleeping with three other women

What an amazing guy. I don't know how your STBXWW could possibly give him up.

Sorry about the STD. Hopefully you can get started on a med to get it under control.

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