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Nasty Comment! Need to vent.

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2hurtbyfar posted 4/24/2014 01:38 AM

Just have to vent.... Grrrr

Last night we were at friends for dinner, and WH was given a bottle of red wine to open for me as everyone else was having beer.

So he opens the wine, has a sip then turns around in front of everyone and says "this wine is so good, you are not worth it!"

Such a nasty comment! I turned around to him and loud enough said "F*CK YOU" and ignored him the rest of the evening.

When we got home he tried to apologise saying he didnt mean it that way...

I am just so angry with him. Wonder if this is the start of another DD? Previously when he was nasty towards me was when there was another OW on the scene.

Sorry, just needed to vent!! thanks for listening!

Ostrich80 posted 4/24/2014 01:42 AM

Oh no he didn't!!!! What a rude asshole. I would be pissed. Wtf, did he think that was going to get laughs? I'm sure it must have been awkward for everyone who heard it. Chicken shit move

StillLivin posted 4/24/2014 01:59 AM

I knew a couple like this. He made disparaging or downright nasty comments about his beautiful, sweet wife. He made himself look real bad. She finally left him, funny, nobody questioned why she left an asswhole like him. Years later and he was still crying the blues about letting her go was the biggest mistake he ever made! Years later she was happily married to a really great guy and never spared asswhole a thought. True story. Can't believe after all these years I still remember them.

dailyflowers posted 4/24/2014 04:43 AM

GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!! feeling your anger!!

mine said "Bite my a$$" last week and I almost threw something at him.

so unnecessary

ladycody posted 4/24/2014 04:54 AM

Ugh...and what way DID he mean it?!?!? @$$
I give you credit for being as restrained as you were...I think I would have lost it. Am sorry you had to deal with that :(

steadfast1973 posted 4/24/2014 05:08 AM

My fWH was like that. He'd treat me like shit in front of people. And people started noticing it. And we had a big fight, and I told him I looked stupid, and was tired of it. He got all uppity, and decided to poll our friends... The consensus was they thought he was an asshole.

Since dday2, he hasn't. A couple of "funnies' have slipped, but he's apologized immediately.

It was his WALL. The wall to keep me from getting too close. If I got too close, I'd see who he really was an leave... (If only i was that smart...)

confused615 posted 4/24/2014 05:31 AM

I.would.be.livid.

BreatheAgain10 posted 4/24/2014 10:06 AM

What an effing asshole comment! I don't know how you didn't slap him for it
Why do some men have such a retarded sense of humor?

TheBestMe posted 4/24/2014 10:38 AM

((2hurtbyfar)) My H used to make fun of me in front of people, when he was in the A. The talk was different; more of a put down or a slight. Other people notice when our SO are not nice to us. When I told my relative about the A, she told me that her son had stated that he did not like how my H spoke to me.

When my H would make nasty comments to me, even in private, I was not in the frame of mind to put him in check. Let him try that shit NOW. I can better communicate with him how those comments make me feel. Also, we can talk about why he said it. Some behaviors are simply childish or thoughtless.

deena04 posted 4/24/2014 10:41 AM

I would have commented that I am worth it, but you're not since you cheated...throw the shame game his way. That's me, though.

steadfast1973 posted 4/24/2014 10:43 AM

Let him try that shit NOW.

Exactly. We had one issue, about a month after dday2... and we went to a big group dinner... and he started being an ass... and I called him on it, right there in front of everyone... and he started around the table, "did you think that was mean?" general consensus, "Yeah, dude, that was mean. And you do it all the time."

deena04 posted 4/24/2014 10:59 AM

Gently, this may not apply to all situations, but to put down and condescend seems to be a control tactic and verbally abusive tactic. Again, it may not always be true, but can often be true. It seems to be a way to make someone question their self-worth and put themselves in an upper hand situation. It can also be used to make themselves feel better or less guilty with their own actions. Either way, it sucks and is not right!

allusions posted 4/24/2014 11:18 AM

He doesn't think you are worth a bottle of fermented grape juice? Really?

Charity411 posted 4/24/2014 11:46 AM

I'd have broken the bottle over his head like I was launching a new ship with a bottle of champagne. I'd be launching him right out the door.

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