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I have finally had enough of the lies. As if I would ask or accuse him of ANYTHING without having proof beforehand-- and still he lies and curses me for daring to question his truthfulness. I am done.

Is there a place here where we have steps listed that we need to take when we have decided on divorce? Or can someone give me steps?

1) Find 2-3 D lawyers. Ask family, friends, and even strangers
2) call each L and "interview" them.
3) retain a L
4) do what the L tells you to do

There are other steps that you can do to gather the information that you need, but the first step is to get a L.

The lawyer will ask for financial information, so make sure you have that. Have an idea of your budget so you know what you need to survive while the D is happening. Think about what YOU want, and know that you will probably not get everything.

Do not discuss ANYTHING with your WH. Copy those financials and put them in a safe place. Do you know where that stuff is?

Stay on the high road.

Communicate in print. Type every word as if a judge is reading it over your shoulder (don't remember who said that here on SI, one of the best things I've taken away from here).

Lawyer up. Some will offer free consultations. Google "questions to ask a divorce attorney". There are things you should ask about billing, what percentage of their practice is D, etc. during the consultation.

Document, document, document.

Take care of you.