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Reconciliation :
How to cope with WH that had to travel with work

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 stunnedmullet (original poster member #42975) posted at 9:58 AM on Monday, April 28th, 2014

WH has some travelling with work. He hooked up with AP in 3 different states but each time he was travelling with work or met her after work functions.

He found out today his role is incorporating managing another state as well as where we currently are but it is the state the AP lives in (my hometown). He says he will travel once a month there for two days and will stay with my parents when he is there

Realistically I know the A could occur anywhere as it did but being separate was a big factor in that. But I feel sick to think he will be travelling back there once a month and has the perfect opportunity to hook up.

I am struggling enough but now this. It is just pushing me deeper into my black hole. I am really doubting I can survive this. I just don't want to be here anymore

DD April Fools Day 2014 (unfortunately no joke)

BS (me) 45
WH 43
OW - a friend of WH for 5 years

4 month EA which turned into a 5 month PA

married 22 and 7 kids

Attempted reconciliation for 18 months until he walked out without warning

posts: 367   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Australia
id 6776632
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brokensmile322 ( member #35758) posted at 10:12 AM on Monday, April 28th, 2014

Hi Stunned,

There is a thread for those of us whose WS travel for work. If you haven't found it yet, here it is:

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=526482

Just wanted to tell you that I understand what you are feeling. It IS scary when they travel, especially to the place where the AP lives. My WH worked with OW who lived several hours away. He would have to travel to work WITH her occasionally.

You can do it, but it will require your WH to be very, very transparent and diligent when he is away. I needed almost constant contact at first. He no longer works with his OW, but still travels to her area occasionally. I am much better now though. At 2 years out, if you do the work on YOU, you can get to a place where you realize that your WH can cheat anywhere. You let go, but it requires you really working on you to make you strong. Are you in IC? That has been the single biggest lifesaver for me. Hugs!

Me BS 42 Him WS 44
OW Coworker DDay April 7, 2012
EA on a slippery slope...

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~Viktor Frankl

"When you are happy, you can forgive a great deal."

posts: 2040   ·   registered: Jun. 5th, 2012
id 6776636
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