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Gym Drama

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Weatherly posted 5/1/2014 09:57 AM

I have been going to the Y and working out for about a year now. I found I love Zumba, There are 2 female instructors, one who I like, but her class is really easy. And one who I don't like, but her class is harder, so I go. There was a male instructor who I never liked. I thought he was an arrogant jerk. But, damn, his classes were a great workout and always packed. He almost had Zumba bootcamp, and you got made fun of if you couldn't keep up.

Guy got fired Friday. Which, was shocking because he had 3-4x more students than any other instructor. He announced he'd been fired and a lot of people were all "oh no, I'm so sorry. how could that do that." Understandable. I said it too, and thanked him for helping me get in better shape.

Now, there is this huge backlash against the Y for firing him. I know what incident was the final straw, and yes, he was an asshole. I know a couple other things too. But, I don't know the whole story. Well, yesterday, he writes a post like "fuck the Y, fuck the directors. You are lucky i'm a nice guy or you'd be on the floor. How dare you fucking disrespect me like that? i'm a veteran. You can't do this to me, and this isn't the last you've seen of me. I know you assholes are reading this."

This is the....4th? 5th? Gym he's been fired from in the last year. Every time there is some big post about how everyone hates him because he's so successful and so great at what he does. Lots of stuff about "haters".

So now, there are a ton of people trying to get him hired back, writing petitions, etc. My friends are pressuring me to sign it, write letters, etc. I think after that last post, he won't be hired back, no matter what. Everybody is directly against the director, who has been nothing but awesome to me and the kids. I'm getting e-mails about how anyone who doesn't quit is a traitor and a backstabber. The Guy sent me a message today that was "Hey, I hope you will help support truth, handwork, and veterans and tell the director you are withdrawing your membership if they don't let me come back." About 50 people are planning to show up at his class time tomorrow and just sit there and ignore whoever they bring in. He is definitely encouraging it.

It has been so hard for me to make friends, and I had a few who are now involved in this. So, my options seem to be 1. take part in this, that I don't even think I agree with, and alienate myself from the rest of the staff (who i like!) 2.Ignore (or don't ignore but don't help and explain why) and lose my friends

I'm feeling very pressured and kind of harassed. What would you do?

(right now, I'm leaning toward just ignoring everything. Continuing to go to a gym I like, that has stuff for the kids, and if I lose the friends, I guess I'm no worse off than I was a year ago)

karmahappens posted 5/1/2014 10:01 AM

I would not follow the others if it went against my gut feeling.

Nobody knows what really went on and IMO if he has been let go from 5 other places, something has to be going on.

I would avoid the drama, go to the classes you enjoy and be comfortable knowing you followed your belief.

Nobody has the right to bully you into an action you disagree with.

Bobbi_sue posted 5/1/2014 10:05 AM

You asked what I would do. I would stand for what is right. I don't care how well he was "liked" or how much money he brought in. The guy has shown himself an ass and I would not support him in his belief he should remain employed in those circumstances. In fact, I applaud the Y if they stick with their guns and get rid of him in spite of the fact he may be a big draw at their organization, and may even lose clientele for firing him. I am not really a fan of "arrogant jerks." But they are fans of themselves and do get followers.

[This message edited by Bobbi_sue at 10:06 AM, May 1st (Thursday)]

imagoodwitch posted 5/1/2014 10:05 AM

I think the phrase "Don't pet the drama llama" applies here.

If the guy has been fired from 4 or 5 gyms this year........ that says it all to me.

Pentup posted 5/1/2014 10:06 AM

I would ignore. Even if I did not agree with him being fired,his actions post firing are immature and arrogant.

As for your friends, I would say, I liked his class, but there is an opportunity now for someone who may even be better.

tushnurse posted 5/1/2014 10:08 AM

Personally I would disengage for a bit. Stay away from the Y for a week or so, and block this douche from your FB.
That is way out of line. If he's been fired multiple times there is a reason. If he can't get it together long enough to respect his superiors, and behave like a civilized person that's on him.

Let the smoke clear and then go back. If people ask where you were, tell them you don't do drama.

soverybetrayed posted 5/1/2014 10:15 AM

This guy sounds like a bushel full of crazy and drama! He is not your friend, he posted nasty things about his former employer (which will/can be seen by future employers) and eggs on drama with former class participants. Stay clear of him and his groupies.

If you lose friends because you do not want to join his drama then they were not real friends. This is your life and you have to stand up for what you believe in and not follow the herd. I know that you are a very strong person so you can follow your own beliefs and be proud of doing it.

hexed posted 5/1/2014 10:20 AM

((weatherly))

The Y is supposed to be a positive environment. If his behaviour was negative regardless of how great his class is, then he deserved to be fired. Workplaces require a certain amount of decorum. Being an asshole won't cut it.

I would stay out it. If questioned, I would tell people that the Y in general has treated you and the kids well. Since you don't know both sides of the story you don't feel comfortable making a judgement on the situation. Its easy to judge based on what we want personally, its much harder to view facts on both sides or withhold judgement because we don't know everything.

norabird posted 5/1/2014 10:21 AM

I would not want to pursue a friendship further if it dragged me into this kind of mess. You know? Life is too short. I wouldn't want this guy working under me if I were the Y director, no matter how good his classes were. And putting this kind of pressure on you is not inappropriate. The fact that you're uncomfortable with it means the pressure is crossing a boundary for you. Trust that reaction.

Weatherly posted 5/1/2014 10:35 AM

Personally I would disengage for a bit. Stay away from the Y for a week or so, and block this douche from your FB.

Thats a good plan. I won't even be in town next week, plus, if they are all boycotting the Y I guess I won't run in to anyone there. definitely not going tomorrow.


I would stay out it. If questioned, I would tell people that the Y in general has treated you and the kids well. Since you don't know both sides of the story you don't feel comfortable making a judgement on the situation.

Also good advice.

Even my husband and I got into a disagreement about this! He loves the guy. I really don't, I think the Y was right. I just liked being able to get in such a good workout by 9am.

woundedwidow posted 5/1/2014 10:48 AM

I think Tushnurse's recommendations were spot on. Plus, the instructor's post-firing rants were unprofessional and, frankly, threatening. I can see how there may have been cause to fire him from 4-5 other gyms this year, because he seems to have a real anger issue with management. At this point, no matter what the other students/Y members do, there is no way that he's going to be rehired. That would be a total nightmare for management there.

Skan posted 5/1/2014 19:34 PM

"I have already taken the action I deemed appropriate." repeated ad nausem to anyone who asks you to sign, go on-line, bitch, complain, etc.

Kajem posted 5/1/2014 20:26 PM

I wouldn't get involved.

Most places of employment follow a set of protocols before terminating an employee, otherwise they can be sued. Verbal warnings, written warnings etc all need to be documented before terminating an employee. I doubt they did this lightly.

sparkysable posted 5/2/2014 10:47 AM

Sounds like a Narcissist to me. Talking about how great he is, how it's never his fault, always everyone else's, look how great I am!

People don't get fired 4-5x in A YEAR for doing nothing....

sparkysable posted 5/2/2014 10:48 AM

Sounds like a Narcissist to me. Talking about how great he is, how it's never his fault, always everyone else's, look how great I am!

People don't get fired 4-5x in A YEAR for doing nothing....

Crescita posted 5/2/2014 11:11 AM

I wouldn't worry about your gym friends, it sounds like this guy's ability to manipulate has a 3 month max. If they want to quit going to the Y and follow him around, they will quickly realize the error when he gets fired from the next place.

You are going to look like a genius when they end up back at the Y in 2 months.

JanaGreen posted 5/2/2014 11:12 AM

My goodness. I think your friends are far too invested in the staffing of the gym. I would just work out at home for a bit until the crazy dies down.

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