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Divorce/Separation :
Recommend books for healing during divorce

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 hurtyetstrong (original poster member #38372) posted at 2:50 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

I checked out the healing library, seems like most of the book recommendations are geared towards reconciliation.

I have made up my mind to separate and need help building a backbone to stand up to WH when he tries to hoover me back.

Me: BW (31)
Him: WH (32)
2 DDs - 4yrs & 2yrs (as of Oct 2014)

multiple PAs

Filed for divorce May 16, 2014
1st court hearing October 23, 2014 (rescheduled :/)
divorce final November 20, 2014

posts: 157   ·   registered: Feb. 6th, 2013
id 6782883
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norabird ( member #42092) posted at 3:16 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

Getting Past Your Breakup by Susan Elliot.

Living and Loving After Betrayal by Steven Stosny.

The Breakup Bible by Rachel Sussman.

I read all of these and found them helpful. The Sussman is the fluffiest, the Stosny is the most calming, and the Elliott is the most practical, quick-and-dirty.

Sit. Feast on your life.

posts: 4324   ·   registered: Jan. 16th, 2014   ·   location: NYC
id 6782921
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justinpaintoday ( member #42858) posted at 3:25 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

Getting past you breakup. Im half way through but love it so far. Practical and direct.

I never realized you could be in this much pain and not be dying.

posts: 700   ·   registered: Mar. 22nd, 2014
id 6782940
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Abbondad ( member #37898) posted at 3:45 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

I always recommend The Journey from Abandonment to Healing. It's the only one of these books that really impacted me and which I go back to again and again.

Divorced April Fool's Day 2014

Fear is the mind-killer.Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.I will face my fear.I will permit it to pass over me and through me.-Dune

posts: 2088   ·   registered: Dec. 25th, 2012
id 6782972
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DepressedDaddy ( member #41521) posted at 3:48 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

This is what I am reading and it is fantastic...

"The Language of Letting Go" by Melody Beattie

It is a daily meditation guide. It has a ton of great topics. I highly recommend it!

Since D I have become DDaddy 2.0 - or better known as DevotedDaddy

“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so."

posts: 1255   ·   registered: Dec. 3rd, 2013
id 6782979
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 4:16 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

Getting Past Your Breakup. And do the exercises she suggests!

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6783033
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sparkysable ( member #3703) posted at 7:04 PM on Friday, May 2nd, 2014

I found Runaway Husbands to be very helpful.

D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.

posts: 5718   ·   registered: Mar. 8th, 2004   ·   location: NY
id 6783328
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