This is all still so new for me, I have really bad days and some ok days on accepting where we are, moving towards D. As summer approaches and vacations are being planned, how does one make it through the pain? What are good coping skills I should start reading up on now?
WH's family reunion is this June - I'm so sad that not only am I D him, but I am D his awesome fun family. I don't know what I'm going to do that week. I know the kids will have a blast, I'm just so sad that I will be missing my 'family'.
I just booked a fall break trip with my brother and sister in law with the kids. It's going to be so great - Hawaii Disney Resort - I am super excited, but I can't stop thinking how I wish my 'old H' could also go. We were a great team on vacations, I was the organized planner, he was the spontaneous fun idea guy. New memories will be made, but not as a family..half a family.
And I know WH will plan trips coming up soon. To miss my kids enjoying new adventures is going to be so painful and hard.
We had plans to take them to DC, now how is that going to happen? I do a trip he does a trip - I don't think so. What if WH plans the trip - that is something that I wanted to do. The kids keep talking about taking a cruise and how I always wanted to do that - what if he plans that?
I keep reading out here, I know it gets better - but thinking about summer and trips makes me so sad to be missing out on my kids lives. It makes me so mad at WH - how can he do this to us - it doesn't make any sense and it never will.