"Better not give in to it. It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart.”
My boys are 12 and 8 and they still don't know how to ride a two-wheeler. Due to chronic back problems, I can't run next to them while they learn. STBXH...well I don't know what his excuse is.
My boys' bikes are in storage because we lost our house due to STBXH's fuckery. The weather's been okay so the boys have been asking about them. My parents, whom the kids and I are living with, got a couple of my nephew's old bikes, took them to a bike shop for a tune up, and are now outside having a 'bike wash' with the boys. The plan is to take them to the park tomorrow to teach them to ride without training wheels on a gentle grassy hill there.
For a moment I felt sad for STBXH missing out on this little slice of life. Then I thought, "FTG!" Shortly after S I asked him if he missed us. He said he "missed the noise we'd make." WTF? The noise??!! What about doing things with us, or talking with us? But I guess he hadn't really been doing that for a long time.
Also today, I let DD17 play hookey to take the Driver's Test. (She passed first try! ) Then we went out to lunch together and discussed the upcoming EuroVision semi-finals and how best to watch them next week. Then she decided to go pickup DS12 from school to "show him she got her license and could drive by herself." Another once in a lifetime moment he's totally missing out on.
So what am I supposed to miss about my old life? I was basically a single parent before. Now I have my parents to help and share the joys. All that's missing is a sex life. I guess that's what they make BOBs for, and I don't have to worry about STDs.
Half of my purpose is to share and encourage others. The other half is to help drill into my own head that the 'pity party' is over. Time to copy and paste this to my journal to re-read when I'm feeling low.
― Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay
Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013