My X asked me to take her weekend with the kids this week. I of course agreed, to be with my kiddos. I had an interesting interaction with my 16 yo yesterday. He and I were talking about when I might move things into the new house. I told him that maybe today, but that I hadn't heard back from X about taking the kids's beds yet, so I probably would have to hold off until next week.
He asked when I had sent the email, and when I told him Friday morning he responded by saying that X might not have internet where she is. So I asked where she had gone. He got a look on his face and said thAt he didn't think he could tell me. So I got quiet and he asked why I cared. I told him that I didn't care where she went, but I was concerned about the fact that he had a burden of keeping secrets. He nodded.
He asked whether I would have wanted him to tell X about my vacation the other week. I told him that my expectation of him is that he is allowed to say anything or talk about anything he wants about me with X. If there is anything that I don't want him to know, then he won't know about it.
He said that it was helpful to him to know that.
What a learning curve this whole post-affair thing is.