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Newest Member: Tigress5455 (45753)

User Topic: panic at the grocery store
Jbluebird
♀ 43185
Member # 43185
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So today is my WH birthday and I go to the store to get his fav dessert as a surprise and who do I see?? The OW for the first time. I was with our kids. She stared at me. I felt rage and incredible sadness at the same time. Held it together flew outta there n came home. I was so determined to make today a good day n now I am sick. I feel so ugly and stupid and embarrassed and angry. I didn't tell him because I don't want to bring that up today. Uggghhhh I feel like the universe is out to destroy me.


Married 2005
DDay 1 2 months before wedding
DDay 2 Sept2006(denied til Dec'11)
2009 my A (open relationship BS)
2010 FALSE R
DDay Dec 2011
False R for 2 years
DDAY Jan 2014

3 awesome kids! (My light)


Posts: 41 | Registered: Apr 2014
Jbluebird
♀ 43185
Member # 43185
Default  Posted: 3:23 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

And to top it off I come home to him wearing the shirt I suspect he wore out with her. I don't want to act out but this anger is killing me. Why does the stupid shirt bother me so much??!


Married 2005
DDay 1 2 months before wedding
DDay 2 Sept2006(denied til Dec'11)
2009 my A (open relationship BS)
2010 FALSE R
DDay Dec 2011
False R for 2 years
DDAY Jan 2014

3 awesome kids! (My light)


Posts: 41 | Registered: Apr 2014
heartbroken2012
♀ 38089
Member # 38089
Default  Posted: 3:31 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It is hard to see the OW. It is like someone is stabbing you in the heart, and then it makes you want to run at them with a bat.

I have to see the horrible wretched slut quiet often in her car.

I have resolved that if I see her at the grocery store, I will go up and say that I am surprised they let ugly, old, white trash home wrecking sluts shop in their store. And I will tell her to die and go to hell. (I know you aren't supposed to give them the satisfaction of letting them know they have space in your head, but...as some WS say while in the fog...I couldnt help myself.)

I feel for you.

[This message edited by heartbroken2012 at 3:33 PM, May 6th (Tuesday)]


BS(Me) - 32
WS(HUbbie) - 40
OW - 44 (a ugly, old, white trash horse faced Coworker)
Affair was 2 months long
3 kids - 5yr old, and twins 8 months
Dday - 12/25/12 (lots of signs before I should have seen)

Posts: 557 | Registered: Jan 2013
Jbluebird
♀ 43185
Member # 43185
Default  Posted: 3:33 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I wish I could say something like that. I know myself well enough that is she said anything fly back my self control would go out the window....


Married 2005
DDay 1 2 months before wedding
DDay 2 Sept2006(denied til Dec'11)
2009 my A (open relationship BS)
2010 FALSE R
DDay Dec 2011
False R for 2 years
DDAY Jan 2014

3 awesome kids! (My light)


Posts: 41 | Registered: Apr 2014
JanetS
♀ 2766
Member # 2766
Default  Posted: 3:36 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd ask him to toss the shirt.

Sorry you were triggered today.


Posts: 2641 | Registered: Nov 2003 | From: Niagara-on-the-Lake, Canada
Nature_Girl
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 3:37 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think you shouldn't force yourself to swallow all of this pain & agony all by yourself. You are in pain. You have been wounded. I think you should tell him and let him walk through this with you.

Martyrs never come out of their trials alive.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

Posts: 10032 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
mightsurvive
♀ 38794
Member # 38794
Default  Posted: 4:33 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have seen the OW at the grocery store several times. Totally gets me and now just going there I feel I will run into her. The last time I saw her I confronted her...didn't help. You did the right thing there but maybe reconsider sharing with your WH but after you cool down a bit? This pain is too much to bear by yourself.


BW 37-me
WH 40
Kids
Dday Dec 2011
Reconciling

Posts: 48 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: midwest
devasted30
♀ 39439
Member # 39439
Default  Posted: 4:34 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hell, burn the shirt. I did and it felt great. And anything else he wore that reminds you of the OW. Clothes are replaceable, you are not!!!


And remember Murphy is right. Nothing is so bad that it can't get worse!!!

Posts: 1384 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Ontario, Canada
Jbluebird
♀ 43185
Member # 43185
Default  Posted: 8:51 PM, May 6th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It took some time but I calmed down, cleared my head and decided to not make an issue. I kindly asked him to change his shirt and he obliged but it was awkward because he wanted to know why and I didn't want to get into it. I really want a break from all this. I decided yesterday I just wasn't going to let my mind wander today, we had an lot going on and I wanted to just busy myself for a much needed break. Well talk about it tomrw at MC
thanks for the support & words- it helped so much to let it out to someone!


Married 2005
DDay 1 2 months before wedding
DDay 2 Sept2006(denied til Dec'11)
2009 my A (open relationship BS)
2010 FALSE R
DDay Dec 2011
False R for 2 years
DDAY Jan 2014

3 awesome kids! (My light)


Posts: 41 | Registered: Apr 2014
Topic Posts: 9

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