Anyway, next week would have been our 20 year anniversary. I absolutely refuse to celebrate, but any advice on how to just get through this most painful day would be much appreciated. Just thinking about it puts my stomach in knots, which isn't an everyday occurance anymore.
You are under no obligation to celebrate your anniversary.
One option is to recognize it, without celebrating it, if that makes any sense. Maybe treat yourself to something nice. Maybe a spa treatment, or a quiet day in the park?
Another thing that I have found about these big dates that come up is that the anticipation is worse than anything else. Usually, for me anyway, the anticipation is worse than the actual day itself.
Try to breathe. I know 20 years is a big one. We're here for you. Let us know how things go.
Sending support your way.
I am so sorry that this is so painful, twenty years is such a milestone and I wish that you were able to enjoy it and not have to deal with all of this hurt. Please consider what the others have said and do something very nice for yourself... You deserve it!!! Thinking of you...
Hugs to you. 3 months is a very small amount of time- especially with 5 children to keep you busy. I know- I have 5 children under 12- it leaves very little time to process the A.
*Winners never cheat and cheaters never win*