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It's the little things

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musiclovingmom posted 5/13/2014 22:24 PM

We've been in a good place for a while. Trust is up. Triggers are down. Communication is better. Of course, everything will be in progress forever.
Today, though, there was an event. My friend took a picture of campaign signs being removed from state-owned land at a local intersection. In the background, my husband's work truck was passing through the intersection - which would mean he was heading from location back to the yard and was likely done for the day. My mind started racing. I checked the time of the post against the current time and worked out where he should be. I took a deep breath and texted to check in. And, you know what, he told me exactly where he was, it lined up with where he should have been and how long it took him to get home was just right. Before, he would have skirted around where he was and then would have said he was trying to surprise me when he figured out I knew where he should be. To almost anyone else I know, this would be so trivial, but for us, it really is a victory.

WeHadItAll posted 5/14/2014 02:05 AM

This is how trust is built, isn't it? Brick by brick, slowing building a new foundation. Happy for you.

Flatlined123 posted 5/14/2014 04:48 AM

I just mentioned this same thing to H the other day. I realized that I have come to believe that he will be where he says he will be, when he says he will be. I couldn't count on that during the A.

That being consistent and conscious of his needing to be consistent is a HUGE step in rebuilding our M and relationship. It's a bit scary to be trusting again. I've worn a coat of distrust for a long time and it's hard to part with it.

So happy for you!

LivingLearning posted 5/14/2014 13:02 PM

So happy for you and your WS.

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