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Yesterday, I take the WW and DD to a preschool tour to see if we liked this one for our daughter. Then we went to DD's fundamental class. At one point, she just kept staring in my eyes, and I was like what you staring at? She was like is it ok to stare at you. I said do whatever you want. I take them back home and then go back to work. After work, took a nap and then came over to play with DD. She asked me for a hug... and then when I was leaving she gave me a hug.

She also talked how she used to come over to and have lunch with me at the place near DD's fundamental where I worked.

She noticed this bump on my face, which is probably cancerous. Never had it checked out and I had picked at it. She said don't mess with it. Like she cared...

This morning, she writes me an email. She is trying to bomb me or hover. I am not falling for that. I put all my energy into putting up my shields.

[This message edited by LostSamurai at 6:58 AM, May 14th (Wednesday)]

Keep up the good work LS. Please get the bump checked. I had a a pre cancerous spot removed at 29 yrs old. I thought it was a,zit. Get it checked out

Did you hug her when she asked for a hug?

Both times?

ARE your shields up?

My DD was in the room and looking and so yea. I did hug her but it didn't do anything for me. I will get the bump checked out eventually. I had it all my life.

I thought it was a zit too until it didn't pop. Shields are up.

Buddy of mine and I went out to see spider-man 2. She texted me about what I was doing and all. I responded...chilling. Then she checked the bank account and was like you didn't tell me you went to the movies. Who you go with?

I didn't think I had to run things by her since she didn't run the affair by me. I been buying stuff online, working out, cleaning the house, and building my ULTIMATE MARTIAL ART SCHOOL in my backyard. It's going to be so old school.

You are remarkably calm and handling the love bombing well. However, PLEASE go to a dermatologist and get your possibly cancerous area checked! Don't wait too long; get it handled. OK?

I will. I had other family members have it removed and was near the same area as well. My dad just got his removed a couple weeks ago.

I will go see a dermatologist.

The Lover Bomber came back again yesterday. Gave me multiple hugs in front of the daughter and sent me two emails early this morning.

Is this normal? Is this like a cheap butt kissing or something?

I wonder, isn't there anything in your martial arts training that teaches you to listen to your inner self? To "live" or "fight" or "be" within yourself?

There's a sadness I *hear* when I read you man, like, a loneliness, a division, an estrangement - from yourself. It's why questions about simple actions from *outside* are so puzzling to you - when the answer inside, sits *right there*.

How about telling me how you feel, in a post, say, how are you doing with the 180? See, the deeper you go, into *inside listening*, the less empty external blandishments affect you. You begin to sense a certainty about yourself. When you meet, make friends with, and begin listening to your core, silly, meaningless motions from outside become clear for what they are.

You know this.
I wish you clarity brother.
How's it going inside my brother?

Time to stop the hugs. Inform WW that it is sending mixed signals to DD, an you don't want to confuse her so there will be no more hugs. If WW attempts to hug you again, she will be the one causing a scene.

Good luck.

LS aren't those hugs pissing you off? She is doing it to control, not out of love. You allow it, because you don't want to upset, or show your daughter you have a broken relationship? She already gets that dude. Afterall you and her haven't lived together for months.

Tell her you will no longer tolerate physical touch from her, in an email. It sickens you (what it does is weaken your resolve). Take control and like jjct says, listen your innerself, the rest is just noise.

Yep. In total agreement with the others here LS. Serious words of wisdom they have for you. You need to set up some boundaries for yourself and let her know that physical contact of any sort is not ok.