Does it concern you that the single guy's comment basically lets you know that your WH has engaged in inappropriate behavior with him before?
Did you know about it? Is that where the cheating took place?
If not, I'd be asking WH for full disclosure on the types of inappropriate stuff he used to do with this guy.
It's really up to him to direct the actions. It's really hard for them the first few times to demand the respect their spouse deserves, but then they get the swing of it, and others are blown away by it.
So as I see it, you need to have a discussion about him demanding respect of you. And you need to distance yourselves together from Single Guy. He's quite the douche.
The cheating took place months after the last gaming trip. But I did know about strip clubs... Oddly, when the escort thing happened, my fwh was appalled by the guy's behavior. He called me from the hotel parking lot, hanging with Single Guy and another friend, and they were all three disgusted with him, and angry because they all paid for the shared room... But, he has since told me, it was part of his "interest". Started with disgust, then went to curiosity, then over time, with justifications, became "normal". Between all the time they were spending together, and the porn... it just seemed like what married men were supposed to do. I have gotten all of the information since dday2...
Now, I will say that this single friend is a sweet guy... and I was surprised... my wh says Single Guy still hangs with the scum bags, and may be starting to see that behavior as normal... He says he may be another friendship to become a casualty to his stupid selfish actions.
[This message edited by steadfast1973 at 11:53 AM, May 15th (Thursday)]
And really what single guys do, is their business. But to expect married friends to go along is wrong.
And to just accept as normal when Married friends do it, is sickening.
Sorry, this is one thing that my WH did and it really gets to me in a big way.
All of that part is new to me. None of this was an issue after dday1... of course, that's because it was false R.