Its late and as usual, I can't sleep. I'm up thinking about what I want to do and what is going to best for all of us.
My employment ends next Wednesday... I'm sad, I was there 13 years. I built a career there but taking a severance package and moving on was something I had to do. I couldn't make more money there and I can't totally depend on stbxh to have support for me on time or a specific amount. He left me in a lease that I cannot afford comfortably even with support.
So on top of everything else he has forced on me, taking the package was something I had to do. I stayed at that job forever so that he could jump around, change career paths, make irresponsible career choices while I was steady and reliable. I now have to say goodbye to 13 years because financially I can't stay there I have to find something else. So I lose something I built long term because of him...one more thing I lose.
So now I'm contemplating staying here or moving north. He's not being a good father to our children while playing fake daddy to his whores kids. I have no family here....why should I stay.
My teenagers won't be thrilled about moving. The little guy won't be either. If stbxh really got his shit together and put all 3 kids first I wouldn't want to do this. His bullshit is crushing my babies they are hurting so badly.
We need a fresh start, we need to get away from him. I never thought in a million years that I would consider moving my kids away from their dad but I never thought he would turn into a complete selfish ass man who would put someone before them.
I really feel its time we move on.