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This man is 69 shades of stupid

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whiteflower99 posted 5/18/2014 18:52 PM

how the hell do I stop this or can I? He has withdrawn all of the $$$ from his 401K. He did NOT ROLL IT OVER TO AN IRA. He has WITHDRAWN it. Which means comes tax time, *I* am going to be hit with part of the liability as we are still legally married.
Can I do anything other than ask him not to?

soveryweary posted 5/18/2014 18:53 PM

WOW! I know when my ex withdrew some money from his 401K, I had to sign.
Are you still married?

whiteflower99 posted 5/18/2014 18:54 PM

Yes. The account is in his name only. It isn't that much money but it's the damned point of the thing. My BFF says he's burning through everything so when the D is final there won't be anything to split.
He's not buying any assets, just spending it all.

nowiknow23 posted 5/18/2014 19:19 PM

Talk to a lawyer yesterday.

one2ndchance posted 5/18/2014 19:37 PM

I'd be pissed also, but don't freak out too much. That money (including the taxes) can be offset in final division of assets.

He IS stupid.

tesla posted 5/18/2014 19:48 PM

But really, do talk to a lawyer.
FTG.

ButterflyGirl posted 5/18/2014 20:04 PM

I withdrew my 401K during the divorce. My lawyer said I could do it, but I had to use the money only for living expenses..

FuckTard hadn't been paying child support AT ALL, so I don't feel bad even a little.. I didn't share one cent of it with him. I was sad to lose my retirement, but I needed the money..

Definitely talk to a lawyer..

gonnabe2016 posted 5/18/2014 20:47 PM

My BFF says he's burning through everything so when the D is final there won't be anything to split.

Which is exactly why people are advised to file ASAP.

Send him an email (today) telling him that you expect him to give you half + the tax/penalty hit of his unnecessary withdrawal.

Lawyer up. NOW.

myowndystopia posted 5/18/2014 21:03 PM

Have you already filed? I know when I filed we were given a restraining order for doing just such as this. We also have to keep all of our receipts in case we question each other's spendings. And like everyone said- if you haven't seen a lawyer.... Go.

Caretaker1 posted 5/18/2014 21:31 PM

OMG why would anyone lose their retirement over a divorce

I think I can posted 5/19/2014 08:08 AM

Can't you file "Married Filing Separately"? Then he would have to pay the penalties.

IrishGirlVA posted 5/19/2014 08:27 AM

And I believe there may be something called an "Injured Spouse" form you can complete at the same time taxes are being prepared. Or perhaps you have to wait to be penalized first and then you can file that form.

I'm very sorry you are married to such a selfish ass!

I'm very happy you are divorcing such a selfish ass!

mamazen posted 5/19/2014 10:32 AM

Mine liquidated his too…and stole every available penny from our joint credit margin (almost 100K). And I'm the responsible one who's max'd my retirement input all these years…and he's going to get half. Why *not* empty his? "I'll have hers to make up for it, no problem….easy street."

The lightbulb is going on about this---he has so many "secret" expenses, never had $ during the marriage and let me pay for most everything….mmm….and he recently admitted liaisons with prostitutes (both sexes)…I am now sure he was doing this during the marriage.

They really read from the same textbook, don't they?

Good luck whiteflower.

ButterflyGirl posted 5/19/2014 10:51 AM

Can't you file "Married Filing Separately"? Then he would have to pay the penalties.

That's how we filed our taxes.. I paid the penalty when I withdrew it, and I had to put it down as income on my tax return, so I paid the taxes there too. It didn't affect him or his taxes at all..

OMG why would anyone lose their retirement over a divorce

I don't understand this question.. I didn't WANT to lose my retirement, but I had the kids over 90% of the time and was getting NO child support from him. I needed the money, and I would have had to split half of it with him if I didn't withdraw it..

I think I can posted 5/19/2014 15:31 PM

Have you filed for divorce yet, whiteflower? If so, isn't it illegal to dissipate assets?

NotThatGirl posted 5/19/2014 17:48 PM

File as Married but Separate and ask for the Innocent Spouse Relief to CYA. Some info about Innocent Spouse relief can be read here - http://www.irs.gov/taxtopics/tc205.html

gonnabe2016 posted 5/19/2014 18:10 PM

t/j @BG --

I didn't WANT to lose my retirement

I think the previous comment was directed at WF's stbx specifically since he seems to have closed out his 401k for no reason other than to not have to give her half and is *wasting* the money....(just my interpretation anyways).....
--end t/j

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