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It feels good and give me hope

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DepressedDaddy posted 5/18/2014 23:57 PM

Recently, I have had a couple of women show some interest in me, flirted my way and gave me some extra attention. Granted, I am not entering into any relationships with these individuals. I need to get through my D in one piece and not drag someone else into everything. Plus, I need to continue working on myself.

I just feel it is a good sign that having a little interest sent my way just makes me feel good. It is exciting to talk to them and just feel good again. It tells me that hope is on the horizon and that my STBXWW did not ruin everything about me. Well, even if she tried to ruin everything about me, I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of doing so.

Sometimes it's these little steps that make me realize the progress I have made. It feels good.

cayc posted 5/19/2014 06:20 AM

Yay to flirting! (why do I feel the need to qualify that, yay to flirting when you're tapping your foot waiting for the D to be final, or the D is final, and you're single ... must be my years on SI lol).

Btw, the only thing your stbxww ruined was your M, everything else about you is all good!

better4me posted 5/19/2014 08:54 AM

It is a good sign that being the "flirtee" feels good and hopeful. It is good that it signifies to that you will be happy again in the future. It is also a very good sign that you know yourself and your journey well enough not to engage in anything more than flirtation right now.

Enjoy the feeling!

[This message edited by better4me at 8:55 AM, May 19th (Monday)]

renee21 posted 5/19/2014 22:50 PM

Good for you, progress is good.

I'm like yourself, still have the D to get through and not ready to date. But it is nice to have a normal human being show some extra interest in you.

Being the BS, most of us probably avoided flirtations and didn't notice the attention because we weren't looking like the waywards. Its very odd to me now, I'm starting to actually notice it.

My 16 yr old daughter points it out to me, she loves messing with me and telling me, hey mom, that guy was checking you out.

Its all very surreal.

Enjoy the attention.

DepressedDaddy posted 5/20/2014 14:24 PM

Being the BS, most of us probably avoided flirtations and didn't notice the attention because we weren't looking like the waywards. Its very odd to me now, I'm starting to actually notice it.

I've always been a guy that loves to have a good time with friends, be silly and joke around. I look back on my life and had I not had the morals I do, I could have had a number of chances to be wayward, but of course I didn't. I'm sure each of you may have had the same opportunities, however we believe in this little thing called faithfulness.

Renee - I agree with you. As my IC put it..."you have been loyal to your STBX your whole relationship. How about now you be loyal to yourself. Allow yourself to just experience yourself." Ever since I started doing this, it is like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am happier, more clear-minded, have more energy and actually look forward to being by myself. Holy shit...I never thought I would get here. I know I still have a ways to go, but man it feels good to just let myself loose and embrace new feelings of happiness.

I keep telling myself - "the source of my happiness lies within myself and not someone else."

MadeOfScars posted 5/21/2014 13:24 PM

Good for you DD. I'm glad you're starting to see interest whether you're ready to pursue anything or not. It is a great feeling to, as you said, know that she "did not ruin everything about" you.

Being the BS, most of us probably avoided flirtations and didn't notice the attention because we weren't looking like the waywards. Its very odd to me now, I'm starting to actually notice it.

I've always been a guy that loves to have a good time with friends, be silly and joke around. I look back on my life and had I not had the morals I do, I could have had a number of chances to be wayward, but of course I didn't. I'm sure each of you may have had the same opportunities, however we believe in this little thing called faithfulness.

Amen!

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