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Still Struggle

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HurtHubby posted 5/20/2014 19:30 PM

Well, it has been years since I have been here but it is one place I feel safe.

I still struggle holding relationships together. Everything is still a red flag to me and I feel helpless. I fall in love so quickly looking for comfort then panic sets in.

Therapy has helped but I have so far to go.

Jut want others to know it can remain a struggle for years after and please do not beat yourself up if you slip up.

My only regret is the people I have hurt along the way.

Thanks for letting me express myself for a bit and best of luck to all of the survivors here.

InnerLight posted 5/21/2014 01:07 AM

Thanks for posting. I think I am in a relationship with signs of health but I also feel the alarm bells go off when we have a disagreement. I can go from love and comfort to fear quickly. I do have a foundation of trust so I think that keeps me from being reactive and bouncing off the walls.

You are not helpless. You can get clear on your needs in relationships, practice communicating them in a respectful way, observing the response and deciding to stay or leave if the actions and words together do not meet your needs. I imagine your counselor a are helping you with that. I had to see therapists, do group therapy and later a relationship coach to get myself ona healthier path.

You are worth doing this important work. It will also have a positive effect on others as you progress. Good luck!

norabird posted 5/21/2014 09:20 AM

(((((HurtHubby))))

Just want others to know it can remain a struggle for years after and please do not beat yourself up if you slip up.

Amen! It's a journey; you will get there!

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