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Months ago, our MC asked if there was any restitution my WH could do to "pay" for his A. I said, "There's nothing that can make this 'even'."

HOWEVER, that was before I learned that he took the A underground for 5 months. Now that I wasted months of going to IC and MC (and its a one hour drive each way), I just reserved an ocean front hotel room at Virginia Beach for 4 days.

This weekend, I'm going (alone) to a friend's birthday party at a resort, then driving to the beach (even though, technically, I/we can't afford this, but what-the-hey).

Seven days of being with friends and then being alone (which I don't mind at all)! I am so looking forward to this!

I will spend that time trying to make the decision whether to R, S or D.

Good for you!

Enjoy your "me" time. We all need it, especially with this shit storm we are caught in.

Wish I could go with, I love the beach. Alas, wrong ocean for me!

Good for you, Oak Street ! My xh spent money on his bimbo, as well, and it was money I later learned we did not have. I should have reserved a month's worth of rooms on the beach; it would have been time far better spent there than at home going to MC and trying to put the pieces of our M back together / a futile exercise, for sure. Go to the party, enjoy your friends, then spend time by the water and, instead of thinking about your mess of a marriage, try to just relax. Take time for you and push aside your WH if you can. Just enjoying R & R for you may end up giving you more clarity later as to your marriage. (((( ))))

Awesome. Truly. Have a great time.

OakStreet,
I did the same. I took the time, to think, to see friends, to try to figure out how I wanted to live and go forward. So, Good for you! Take your time, relax, and spend some time contemplating your life and the life you want going forward. Learn how nice it is to be independent again for a little bit and how empowering it can be. I don't regret one moment, and am so glad I did it.
(Bonus, scared the hell out of my fwh).

I live 10 minutes from the beach and I can tell you I spent a lot of time there by myself working through much of this in my head. In fact I still spend a lot of time there.