It's kind of interesting how the perception of what constitutes a good day changes as one slogs through the process of recovering from infidelity.
In the early days, to me a good day was one where Shards seemed to be enjoying himself and we weren't talking about the affair. A bad day was one where we were falling down the rabbit hole into crazy emotion land, where I had almost no tools for navigating and used the ones I did have to poor effect.
For BH, it was just the opposite. It took me a long time to get that a lot of the time he seemed to be enjoying himself he was mostly just hanging on to the edge of the rabbit hole with his fingertips, trying not to fall down there and "make everything worse". For him a good day was one where he was actually able to process some of the pain from what I did and what AP did to him and from my inability to genuinely understand and acknowledge the depth of his pain.
I think the disconnect, for my part, stemmed from my reality mainly being constructed of feelings, and my seeing people and authorities outside myself as the source of those feelings. The work has been to construct a new reality that is based on using my personal values as my primary decision making tool, rather than feelings which are often fleeting and changeable. People can influence my feelings but not my values.
Just a somewhat random thought from this incrementally EvolvingSoul.