Welcome to SI.
I am so sorry that you had to find yourself here with the rest of us BSs(Betrayed Spouses), but you will find a lot of comfort, support, help & info here. We all know how you feel.
Please know that your WH's (Wayward Husband's ) infidelity is not your fault. You do not deserve this.
Read everything in the Healing Library, & also the threads with the "bulls-eye" in the yellow circles. Remember to drink a lot of water, drink protein drinks if you can not eat, & if you can not sleep, go to the doctor and get a prescription for medication to help you sleep.
Please trust those of us who have been down this road, that it will not always feel this painful----time will help.
Sending you strength & (((hugs)))