What is considered a "normal" amount of sex for men who are 50ish?
I got hit by ED caused by benign enlarged prostate at 48 for several months, but we still fooled around on weekends. (I was a road warrior at the time.)
If he is not enjoying sex, or interested in sex, then I would say check hormone levels, as T drifts as it should normally (this is Gods way of keeping men from becoming daddies at 70 years of age) their desire will drift off. Some men aren't good with general intimacy, and when this happens there can be a big disconnect.
However emotionally healthy men, tend to just be more physical with their spouses, holding hands, hugging, snuggling etc.
If that is missing as well I would encourage you to discuss it. Has he always been uncomfortable discussing sex, you said he tries to laugh it off? Tell him you miss it, and want to understand, and help.
We hold hands all the time when we are out and about, or in the car. At home, not so much. I'd wanted to get a furniture set that had an oversized chair or loveseat so we could cuddle, but he picked out one that has separate recliners with a console in between. He never sits with me on the couch, he never sits on the couch at all.
He used to sneak up and peek at me in the shower, doesn't do that anymore although I still do it to him.
He had a physical done in April, and I would LOVE to see the lab results on his testosterone levels, but he didn't care enough to get them before he left. He's physically fit, he runs daily, and in doing so was able to stop taking blood pressure meds a couple of years ago.
To my recollection, he's NEVER been uncomfortable discussing sex with me.
I think he's just not attracted to me anymore, he seems to prefer 20somethings, primarily of the asian and black persuasion.
Yeah, makes me feel real good about myself...NOT.
If that helps.
If this is a change from what was normal, and what he usually did then.....I'm sorry but, I know we aren't supposed to talk about what brought us here in this forum,I see some flags.
I hope I'm wrong.
But WTH ... PTSD?
I don't think it is ED- there are plenty of people who don't for whatever reason or age have an active sex life but they are close.
He sounds like he is either involved in a fantasy world or just going through something.
Get involved with your life and if it doesn't get better I would suggest therapy.
[This message edited by fireproof at 6:45 PM, May 27th (Tuesday)]