In prep for my monthly MC session tomorrow (which is always nerve wracking since it’s the one moment we talk in the month) I wanted to share all the ways I’m grateful for my wife. I have come to believe in the power of gratitude to leading a happier, healthier life and come to the conclusion that I don’t show my wife nearly enough of it.
I’m grateful she did not divorce me just after dday. Based on my LTA she has every right to leave me without ever looking back. I’m grateful she decided to take the time to think things through, acknowledge the five people involved in our family and postpone the decision until she has calmer thoughts.
I’m grateful she gave me a book of rules for our separation. It spans multiple pages, it covers everything from not drinking alcohol, friends that we agreed I’ll have no contact with, how I’m supposed to notify her of new female contacts in LinkedIn, etc. etc. Many friends have been amazed I’m adhering so strongly to the rule book but in many ways, it’s all we have left. It’s my commitment to her, it’s my promise, my word, who knows, maybe that book will be the first tiny step to rebuilding back the trust I so completely destroyed and I’m grateful she gave it to me.
I’m grateful to all the time she gives me with the kids. Without a doubt, I’m doing the lion’s share of time with the kids, and yes, this was probably partial punishment, partial her needs for space to heal, who knows the exact thought process. Regardless, the highlight of my life is my kids and I see them a LOT which is pretty critical considering I don’t live with them any longer.
Which leads me to my next item, I’m grateful she chose to have those three amazing boys with me. No matter where we go in the future, no matter whether she decides “deal breaker” or “reconciliation” when she is ready, I will always ALWAYS be grateful that she chose to have children with me. In terms of life’s big decisions, that is a whopper and she chose me.
Finally, I’m grateful she attends our monthly MC session. These have been hard for both of us, but really REALLY painful for her. I don’t know what’s in her head, but based on what I see in the meetings, MC must be like being forced into a cell with an ax murderer and hoping you’re alive when you get “released” in 2 hours. Yet still, despite all the pain, she comes to MC and for that I am grateful.
