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Newest Member: Gypsy2017 (60730)

User Topic: Gratitude for my wife
♂ 41801
Member # 41801
Default  Posted: 10:38 AM, May 27th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In prep for my monthly MC session tomorrow (which is always nerve wracking since itís the one moment we talk in the month) I wanted to share all the ways Iím grateful for my wife. I have come to believe in the power of gratitude to leading a happier, healthier life and come to the conclusion that I donít show my wife nearly enough of it.

Iím grateful she did not divorce me just after dday. Based on my LTA she has every right to leave me without ever looking back. Iím grateful she decided to take the time to think things through, acknowledge the five people involved in our family and postpone the decision until she has calmer thoughts.

Iím grateful she gave me a book of rules for our separation. It spans multiple pages, it covers everything from not drinking alcohol, friends that we agreed Iíll have no contact with, how Iím supposed to notify her of new female contacts in LinkedIn, etc. etc. Many friends have been amazed Iím adhering so strongly to the rule book but in many ways, itís all we have left. Itís my commitment to her, itís my promise, my word, who knows, maybe that book will be the first tiny step to rebuilding back the trust I so completely destroyed and Iím grateful she gave it to me.

Iím grateful to all the time she gives me with the kids. Without a doubt, Iím doing the lionís share of time with the kids, and yes, this was probably partial punishment, partial her needs for space to heal, who knows the exact thought process. Regardless, the highlight of my life is my kids and I see them a LOT which is pretty critical considering I donít live with them any longer.

Which leads me to my next item, Iím grateful she chose to have those three amazing boys with me. No matter where we go in the future, no matter whether she decides ďdeal breakerĒ or ďreconciliationĒ when she is ready, I will always ALWAYS be grateful that she chose to have children with me. In terms of lifeís big decisions, that is a whopper and she chose me.

Finally, Iím grateful she attends our monthly MC session. These have been hard for both of us, but really REALLY painful for her. I donít know whatís in her head, but based on what I see in the meetings, MC must be like being forced into a cell with an ax murderer and hoping youíre alive when you get ďreleasedĒ in 2 hours. Yet still, despite all the pain, she comes to MC and for that I am grateful.

WH 41
BS 40
D-Day Oct 28th, 2013
Together 18 years
Three amazing boys 12, 9 & 6
Praying for hope daily

Posts: 260 | Registered: Dec 2013
♂ 35566
Member # 35566
Default  Posted: 11:00 AM, May 27th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nothing to add, just want you to know, from someone who is in a limbo stage as well, that I am pulling for you.

[This message edited by badchoice at 11:01 AM, May 27th (Tuesday)]

Me: fWH/BH 46

Separated transitioning to D

Posts: 730 | Registered: May 2012 | From: L.A.
♂ 43237
Member # 43237
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, May 27th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Best of luck for your MC session. Keep your chin up!

Posts: 43 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: New York
Topic Posts: 3

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