SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Alexisk17 posted 5/29/2014 10:44 AM

It seems that the BS is always encouraged to "work on themselves" after Dday. Well, I did... and just wanted to share a small victory in that regard.

After dday I decided to fulfill on of my longtime goals, a career change. I have wanted to work as a yoga teacher for years but have felt bound to my office job for a regular paycheck. I didn't want to take the extra money and time of training away from my family. Deep down I didn't feel I was worth it. WH spent lots of time away from us for various hobbies but I felt as if I needed his "permission" to do that for myself.

After dday I said screw it! I enrolled in a two year training program and am just wrapping up my first year. I have just registered with a local community centre to teach my first class which starts at the begining of July. This is such a scary and exciting first step, but it means so much to me.

Not only am I proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone but I am immensly proud of WH for supporting me through it. This was a huge test for our relationship but he passed with flying colours. He was home with the kids for every weekend workshop and the classes I attended weekly. NEVER ONCE did he ever question how much time I was spending away or whether we could afford the course fees. This commitment on his part has helped my healing immensly.

It dawned on me this morning that I have deserved this all along. This was the relationship that I have deserved since the very begining and never asked or demanded from WH. Our old marraige is dead, and THANK GOD! I could never go back to that old way of living :)

So, a note of encouragement to anyone who is scared of stepping out of their comfort zone or afraid to spend the time they deserve on themselves. You won't regret it

HowToLiveWithIt posted 5/29/2014 10:48 AM

Congratulations to both of You! It was great that you decided to do it, gave him a chance to prove his commitment and that he took the chance and passed the test. Thanks for sharing this positive story. Way to go!!

rachelc posted 5/29/2014 10:57 AM

that's a great story!

karmahappens posted 5/29/2014 11:10 AM

The best part of having to go through this journey was the healing I allowed myself.

I am so happy for your success and good mojo for your upcoming class!!

Good for you!!

veronique12 posted 5/29/2014 11:14 AM

Good for you, Alexisk. What a wonderful accomplishment. Thank you for sharing. You made me smile.

sisoon posted 5/29/2014 12:22 PM

Neat! Congratulations and best of luck!

Daisy312 posted 5/29/2014 19:05 PM

Congrats! I think that this is one positive that I got out of the A as well. I don't feel guilty taking time for myself or doing things for myself. You are so right that this is what we always deserved, but I think many BSs are selfless people and we forget about ourselves.

Skan posted 5/29/2014 20:22 PM

Namaste!

PollyA posted 5/29/2014 22:12 PM

I love this!!

SadFlower posted 5/30/2014 07:27 AM

Congratulations, Alexisk! What great news. Hurray for you for following your dream!

BTW, I don't know how I would have gotten through these last (almost) two years without yoga. I love the idea that you will be spreading calm and strength (both inner and physical).