I just feel like Im spinning my wheels! When we were getting D, life was very fast... court, documents, private i... kids, visitation... stress...
Then WH left OW and it was bipolar, drug detox, call police on OW for various things, court, etc etc...
Then, in 2012, WH was well enough, and we made enough progress, we moved together to where he found a new job. So that was stressful, lots of decisions (get an apartment, kids in school, etc...)
Now, its 2014. life has settled a bit, and we have time to make longer lasting decisions (example... in 2012, we were grateful anyone would rent to us bc wh had ruined our credit. Now, we are in a better financial position & looking to buy a house)
The two big decisions are where to buy a house (i want to be closer to wh's office, he wants to be 15 miles north in the 'big city') Also, Im 35. I want to have more kids. 2 more. Do I do that now.. wait until we have a house (when will that be)
The past 4 years I have had to make snap decisions. I have had to take what the court gave me and be happy with it. I have had to take the crummy apartment because I couldnt get anything else.
Now... I have decisions that I can take time on. I have the luxury of choices. And Im not picking ANYTHING!!!
I almost need a push, like, my landlord had decided to sell and wants me out by August... or Surprise! You are pregnant!
I have learned how to make lemonade with the lemons life dealt me... Im having a hard time making decisions in a time of peace.