Don't apologize, 5454real
. I probably left out a LOT of crucial data points...
Intimacy (kisses on the neck, deeper-than-lips kisses, touching erogenous zones) in any form currently triggers her, or at least starts her creeping toward a panic attack.
Caresses, touching, scalp massage, back rubs ... all these are fine and dandy, as long as there's no lingering suspicion/doubt that it will lead to anything more. However, I am fortunate enough that I have not associated performing these kinds of gentle touching acts with any kind of expectation. I do this kind of thing for her all the time, and she greatly enjoys my touch.
This is a fairly recent issue ... at least, in terms of her dealing with it and confronting me about it (5/19) ... so it's still new and somewhat daunting. This, too, leads me to hope that this is something temporary. It's only been 10 days of confrontation on this issue, so it's possible that this is just something that is part of the healing process.
I would also like to add that I'm in no rush to resume sex without her in it. I've been celibate/abstinent to sex that doesn't involve Heart (I had some trouble getting rid of porn in my life post-DDay, but I've been free and clear for a few months now, and haven't had any problems).