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heart broken and angry as hell at the same time

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luvbug0915 posted 6/3/2014 17:54 PM

Oh hell!
I had this whole long story typed out but decided to delete it.
Long story short...
One of my dogs stayed with XSO when I left because I could only have 2 dogs in an apartment. Oscar had health issues that needed medication and follow up vet care. XSO did not follow through but did not bother to tell me he was not compliant and whenever I asked he said Oscar was doing well.
I saw Oscar last Wednesday, he was not doing well at all. I took Oscar from XSO straight to the vet. From the best I can tell Oscar had bloody diarrhea for at least a month with no medical attention. It turned out to be intestinal cancer.
Yesterday I held my little boo boo in my arms at the vets office and wept as he crossed to the other side.

What kind of heartless, selfish person watches a 19# dog drop down to 13# and doesn't even bother to seek medical attention?
I get it, Oscar was such a good boy he never had an accident in the house, it was because XSO has doggy doors. But there is no way anyone will ever convince me that POS didn't notice the lack of appetite and extreme weight loss.

I'm just so

My emotions are all over the place today.

Thanks for letting me vent.

lieshurt posted 6/3/2014 18:05 PM

I am so, so sorry hun. That must have been awful for you. Poor Oscar

(((Oscar & Luvbug)))


XSO can rot in hell

luvbug0915 posted 6/3/2014 18:33 PM

I just feel so guilty. I can only imagine how much pain my little boy was in, and to think it was going on for at least a month.
I'm thankful I was able to intervene and end his suffering but I'd like to string XSO up and torture him.

Hey sadcat, I'll take all those awful names you offered for XSO last month!

jjsr posted 6/3/2014 19:11 PM

I am sorry about Oscar and I hope Karma pays a visit to your EX in a big way

lieshurt posted 6/3/2014 20:47 PM

I just feel so guilty.

Don't...you were there for him in the end, holding him as he crossed that bridge. Because of you, he won't suffer anymore. That was the most loving thing you could do for him.

MovingUpward posted 6/3/2014 21:03 PM

(((oscar and luvbug)))

luvbug0915 posted 6/3/2014 21:04 PM

Me too, jjsr!

Lieshurt, I will try to move past the guilt of leaving Oscar behind and not physically checking in more often. I was so naive to trust someone I knew to be irresponsible, I just didn't think he was THAT irresponsible.

fireproof posted 6/3/2014 21:10 PM

Luvbug- I am so sorry! I just don't understand because it is heartless of your SO unless he is that clueless which means you dodged a huge bullet.

He is in a better place and I am glad you were there to comfort him. Just like people I believe animals know when you are there.

Sending a hug and grieve. Don't waste any energy on your exSO which is most likely why he is your exSO. He isn't worth it.

luvbug0915 posted 6/3/2014 21:33 PM

Thanks for the hugs moo. Cyber hugs from SI are the best.

Fireproof, thank you for your words. You are so right, he isn't worth it. Any residual warm feelings or longing I had for him is gone. I think I can finally put him in the rear view mirror.

Oscar, on the other hand, will have a permanent place in my heart and on my bookcase with his brothers that have passed before him.

gonnabe2016 posted 6/4/2014 00:45 AM

I am so sorry.

nowiknow23 posted 6/4/2014 01:11 AM

((((luvbug)))) RIP Oscar. I'm so glad you were with him at the end, honey, as hard as that must have been.

luvbug0915 posted 6/4/2014 07:06 AM

Thank you gonnabe and nik.

Oscar is in a better place and free from pain. As hard as it was, I'm blessed to have been the one holding him, rocking him, and comforting him. He was such a sweet dog and although he didn't live with me the last 6 months, I feel his absence and he is greatly missed.

devasted30 posted 6/4/2014 07:29 AM

(((luvbug0915))) (((Oscar)))

tushnurse posted 6/4/2014 08:48 AM

(((Luvbug)))

Try not to guilt yourself. You didn't know.
Dogs have an amazing ability to deal with pain, and he may not have shown much as far as that goes, and intestinal cancer is not painful, until it is too late usually, because mammals have no pain sensors in their gut. Just stretch receptors.

There is a special place in hell for your X though. You can't be mean to animals, and not go there.

((((and strength)))

Hannah25 posted 6/4/2014 08:56 AM

RIP Oscar...

knightsbff posted 6/4/2014 09:22 AM

I'm so sorry luvbug.

I'm glad you were able to be there for your boy and he felt your love while he was able to peacefully cross the bridge.

(((Luvbug)))

LosferWords posted 6/4/2014 10:47 AM

I'm so sorry, luvbug. Being there for him at the end was the most loving thing you could do.

(((luvbug))) (((oscar)))

itainteasy posted 6/4/2014 11:02 AM

((((((((((luvbug)))))))))))

I'm so sorry about Oscar. But I'm so happy that in his last moments he had his mommy with him who loved him so much.

Dreamboat posted 6/4/2014 11:53 AM

((((luvbug))))

I am soo sorry

I am also soo soo angry at your x!! Not noticing or not caring when a dog loses that much body weight is negligent in the most selfish way. He lost over 1/4 of his body weight, how is it that no one in that household noticed??!!

With the type of "care" that your xso gives, I am surprised either of his kids is still alive

kiki1 posted 6/4/2014 12:11 PM

(((luvbug and oscar)))

He's in a much better place and oh so happy now,
thanks to you.

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