"Better not give in to it. It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart.”
Yes, you will feel happy again. You are actually right on schedule for the "Anger Phase" of the grieving process.
I remember what it felt like to find pictures that 'Dipshit' took of himself jerking off to nude pictures of an acquaintance of ours. Honestly, it was actually worse than when he first told me he had cheated on me. So I understand how devastating this is for you, and how asinine it is when they say "it's no big deal."
For Dipshit, the online affairs were just a stepping stones to RL meetups. His line was, "It was just sex. It didn't mean anything." So I understand your disgust at how people can destroy their marriage for something that is "no big deal."
It does get better. Eventually you'll have a good day, or two. Then you'll start having more good days than bad. It just takes time.
He says, the last few months, he really misses me--I'm not myself anymore and I'm pulling away from him.
Tell him to get used to it. He created this situation with his actions, so he's just going to have to deal with it. Check out the Healing Library for books for your WH to read so he can understand what you are going through. There's a link in the yellow box at the upper left of your screen. There is a book called "Not Just Friends" that might open his eyes a little.
[This message edited by Gemini71 at 8:21 PM, June 3rd (Tuesday)]
― Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay
Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013