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Filed for D today.

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cmego posted 6/5/2014 16:50 PM

Kinda strange, actually. 4 years since d-day, 3+ years from S, I have a completely different life…I finally pushed the D through. I've been trying since March to finish, lots of back and forth again.

Ex finally just gave up and gave me everything I financially wanted and it was filed in court today. I hope the judge doesn't snag it since I requested spousal to be paid even if I remarry, but my L worded it so it shouldn't.

I don't feel sad, I don't feel happy either. Just, kinda…heavy. It is also, oddly, almost exactly 20 years to the day I met him, I filed for divorce. 20 years of my life, this man has fucked with me. From the moment he met me, until yesterday when he was posturing over a minor surgical procedure for ds. 20 years.

Onward.

Williesmom posted 6/5/2014 17:02 PM

((Cmego))

Onward and upward, for sure.

While it does piss you off they they took 20 years of our lives, at least we can make something awesome from what's left.

stungbytravel posted 6/5/2014 17:06 PM


(((CMego)))

Onward is right!

cayc posted 6/5/2014 17:41 PM

It's going to feel good having that legal tie severed. A weight off your shoulders for sure.

Crescita posted 6/5/2014 17:50 PM

(((cmego)))

Dreamboat posted 6/5/2014 18:07 PM

((((cmego))))

I thought you were already D. Or I should say I assumed. I am sorry you still have this chapter of your life to close.

cmego posted 6/5/2014 18:26 PM

If I didn't have two papers due by Sunday, I'd be having a drink tonight.

(My new favorite…Jack Daniels Honey Bourbon mixed with lemonade. YUM.)

Due to financial reasons, primarily COBRA cost, we've remained separated for over 3 years. But, this past 6 months I have been pulling everything apart financially. He had no motivation. I sold the car in our name and leased a new one, sold the house that had his name on it and bought one in my name only…and finally just pushed hard enough to get it done. He will have to start paying my COBRA and he isn't happy…but such is life.

Really wish I could have a drink tonight. Gotta go write a paper on the constitutionality of blah, blah, blah. Sigh. I keep procrastinating and hanging out on SI

[This message edited by cmego at 2:33 PM, June 6th (Friday)]

better4me posted 6/6/2014 14:03 PM

Onward.
Yes. This. (((cmego)))

norabird posted 6/6/2014 14:25 PM

((((cmego))))

StillLivin posted 6/6/2014 15:31 PM

(((cmego)))
Look forward only after this point. Only time to look back is to pull up a lesson learned or a great memory!
Hope your future is a bright one moving forward!

nowiknow23 posted 6/7/2014 08:39 AM

((((Cmego))))) How long do you expect it to take to finalize, hon?

ruinedandbroken posted 6/7/2014 10:13 AM

(((cmego)))

cmego posted 6/7/2014 11:05 AM

Two to three weeks, it should finalize. I'm still kinda numb, but OK. I don't feel like celebrating, as much as my friends want me to. It is hard for them to understand that I never wanted the divorce, so this isn't a celebration for me. This is something I had to do.

caregiver9000 posted 6/7/2014 11:31 AM

(((cmego)))

I didn't celebrate the divorce. I understand. It is a necessary step. I hope that it frees you to move "onward" in the ways you want to. It is symbolic at this point, but a powerful piece of symbolism.

Paper writing mojo!

itainteasy posted 6/7/2014 11:42 AM

((cmego))

A hard step to take, but a necessary one. Your story is one that broke my heart in a million pieces.

You are truly an inspiration. You have handled yourself with grace and dignity in the most painful and harsh circumstances.

I wish you the very best in this next chapter of your life.

How are your kids? Do they know you filed? I know they have held out hope that you and their dad could get back together.

You're in my thoughts.

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