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Up until yesterday, I had 4 cats, all adopted over the course of three years from a local no-kill rescue group called PAWS. I adopted the 4th cat about 2.5 years ago and ever since I brought her home, I've been thinking to myself it was a mistake -- the other three have always picked on her, bullied her, tormented her, etc.

During the last 2.5 years, we all lived in 3 different homes, and each time I moved I hoped it would somehow level the playing field since "territory" would no longer be an issue. Things among the 4 cats would get better for a couple months then return to the pecking order of the first 3 bullying the 4th one. I tried Feliway, segregation, allowing the 4th one to be in places I don't let the other three, but nothing seemed to help. They would chase her, trap her in places and not let her out, scratch her face, etc. She was/is so sweet and laid back, she'd just take it and stay in hiding.

So I finally decided to do what I should've done from the beginning, surrender her back to the shelter so they can find her a home where she won't be bullied. In the end it will be so much better for her, but I can't seem to stop crying. The house is so lonely and empty (even with the other 3 cats and a dog). I keep seeing her or thinking I'll see her on a windowsill or a countertop. It's been less than 24 hours and the silence is deafening.

Just wanted to put all that out there. She was so scared at the shelter last night, she wouldn't even look at me when I said good-bye and "I'm sorry!". I wish there were some way to explain to a pet that it's for the best. I know the shelter people are really dedicated, and they'll take great care of her and find her a good home. But part of me wishes I could take her back and make it all better somehow...

You did the best thing for her.

(((ISPIFFD & kitty)))

I'm so sorry. Giving her up so that she could have a happy life in another home, is completely selfless. You put her wellbeing and happiness ahead of your heart. You are a good momma. I volunteer at a shelter and work with another animal group. She is getting lots of love. Sending you strength and huge hugs. My heart goes out to you.

[This message edited by SI Staff at 10:06 AM, June 6th (Friday)]

(((ISPIFFD)))

You absolutely did the right thing. I know it hurts and feels lonely but in the end the cat will be grateful for a better situation.

I took my daughter's kitten away from her at about 6 months old. It was a time in my daughters life where she was completely out of control, doing drugs, drinking, and being totally self destructive. She had already moved twice since getting her as a kitten and she was getting set to move yet again, this time to her boyfriends house where there were two cats and two dogs.

I'm alergic to cats but I couldn't let her put this cat through anymore trauma. My daughters loser roommates were clearly abusing this cat when she wasn't there. They'd lock her in a closet for three days at a time if my daughter left for a weekend. I don't know what else they did to her but when I took her away she was very afraid of people. She would hiss and go hide if anyone but me and my daughter walked into a room.

I've never regretted taking her away from my daughter. My daughter straightened up her life and is now married to that boyfriend and they are doing great. But I still have Cleo the cat. And after three years she finally will come up to people and let them pet her without being afraid. She sleeps on top of me and sits on my lap and she is no longer afraid. Sometimes, even if it hurts we have to do what's best for the creature.

Sometimes the right thing is the most difficult thing.
To me it shows how much you love her.

I'm so sorry you're separated from her.

I'm sorry. I know how hard this is. I had to surrender our dog a few months ago. My ds is allergic. It's so hard. I still miss her. Hopefully they find new happy homes.

Hugs.