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Newest Member: crazyhorse27 (60763)

User Topic: Insight needed
♀ 38173
Member # 38173
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So dude has been living with the chick since DDay back in January. During that time, his brother has moved to L.A. (from the midwest), daughter has had her first dance recital, and oldest sister graduated from college. There were parties for each one of these events, and regular communication via email and text about the details for the parties. Dude was included on all of them and never showed up to any of them.

Brother has bailed him out of jail, given him clothes when chick bleached and burned his. Given him money to pay off debt so we could buy a house (which only I live in and he refuses to even pick the kids up from). Yet couldnt make his way to his going away party.

DD has been dancing since she came out the womb, recital date been on the calendar since classes stared in october. Dude wasnt there, but brother/Uncle flew back from L.A. to see her perform.

Sis put her education hold and gave him her pell grant money so he could go to college instead at the time (back in 2000) so he could stay in school....Her misusage of it made her ineligible to get it again, and it has taken her some time to get back at it. Yet, he couldnt come to that either stating, he didnt have any gas money to get out to the festivities, but managed to come to the same place where everything was a day later on Mother's day.

In all this, NO one has ever met the chick. His father said strait up "if he bring her around me, I'ma shred em both up with a few words." Not a pretty sight....

His brother said he doesnt want to meet the chick either, and sister said "I wish he would bring that broad around me..."

why would someone choose that for themselves? Why not just be alone until you figure out what yuo feel and what to act on, or not? Why alienate yourself like that..that cant be life. You can't not be around people when they invite and then think you can call them for a bail out.

end rant.....

"Spoil me with Loyalty; I can finance myself...."
ME: BS-33
HE: WS-32
Married 3 years, known 20
2 kids
D-Day #1 12/30/12
False Recovery
D-Day #2 1/21/14
LTA 5 years-ish
Riding the "Struggle Bus"
Living apart....

Posts: 668 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Midwest
♀ 40170
Member # 40170
Default  Posted: 9:03 AM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Why? Because they don't care. They figure everyone will forgive and forget because so many have before.

Me 34 (former BS)
Happily Divorced November 17, 2014.
3 young kids all under 9.
"I'm sorry you don't like my honesty. But to be fair, I don't like your lies."

Posts: 592 | Registered: Aug 2013
♀ 40229
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 2:50 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He does the things he does because he is selfish and delusional. He doesn't want to come out of his delusion an see what everyone else sees, that he is a complete jerk and threw away a treasure for trash.
Eventually trash rots. Everything starts to smell like rotten trash after a while. By compartmentalizing his A and sticking his head in the sand (by ignoring his family and refusing to be around them), he can hold his breath a little longer from the stench.
Just keep doing you NikkiD, you're doing good girl.
Sending strength!

"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 4372 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
♀ 42856
Member # 42856
Default  Posted: 3:24 PM, June 6th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree with what the other two said above. It's an outta-sight, outta-mind thing. If he doesn't have to be around those who'll make him answer to his action, he can pretend everything is alright with what he's done. It's typical behavior. He may actually even be outraged that NO ONE can see it like he does - I mean, can't everyone SEE that this is the best thing that ever happened in his life?!?!

Don't give him time of day. Just keep doing for yourself. Keep your head up and stay smiling!!

Me - 43
WH - 41
Dday - 3/6/14
Married 5yrs, together 11yrs
Status - Divorce from the ass is in progress!

You can see more of my story on my blog here:

"Never give up hope and let time heal you"

Posts: 340 | Registered: Mar 2014
Topic Posts: 4

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