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General :
Custody

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 LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 4:58 AM on Saturday, June 7th, 2014

Should BS always ask for custody of BC (betrayed children)?

I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...

posts: 1045   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Maryland
id 6827757
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5454real ( member #37455) posted at 5:26 AM on Saturday, June 7th, 2014

LS, loaded question with a lot of variables.

I fought for custody because WXW was CLEARLY not good mother material. Semi diagnosed Borderline PD. I had our MC, her IC lined up to testify to such(didn't need it, she *blew up * in court). Our Neighbors testified to her poor parenting skills. I had PI's to testify that she would drop the kids at her parents to go see the OM. Her own parents testified (And in their own words) that I was a *super* father. I had a 9-5 job, I offered *everything* in the way of physical assets for custody. I took college classes in childhood nutrition, early childhood development and to deal with XW, abnormal psych(really needed that one ) Had a parenting plan outlined, daycare and schools lined up. Almost two years, district court, appellate court and the supreme court, later, I had custody.(I won at every level) I also had blown through all of my lifes savings and added $50k to my debt. In short, it wasn't easy.

The courts will consider one thing in determining custody. The phrase *in the best interests of the child* when looking at custody. I will ask you(and this is a very hard question, please look outside your anger) Is she really a *bad* parent? Will your child truly *suffer* harm if she has 50/50 custody, which is the standard default ruling. One issue that will come up is that you have already *shown* you think she is competent. Your child currently *lives* with her correct? By default, her atty will argue that you think her parenting skills are sufficient.

Is this a battle you really feel needs to be fought, or is it punishment for her failure as a wife?

Strength brother.

BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle

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Dreamboat ( member #10506) posted at 5:27 AM on Saturday, June 7th, 2014

IMO, every parent should fight for their child. Unless you strongly feel that your child will be better off with the other parent, then fight for 50/50 at a minimum.

And LS, you need to find a Father's Rights L. Many jurisdictions are biased against fathers, so you need to get people on your side who know and understand how the courts operate in your jurisdiction.

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

posts: 17695   ·   registered: Apr. 25th, 2006   ·   location: A better place :)
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 LostSamurai (original poster member #41347) posted at 5:45 AM on Saturday, June 7th, 2014

i was just asking. I prefer 50/50. she does a good job doing what a mother is supposed to do.

I am the wandering samurai, and I found my freedom...

posts: 1045   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Maryland
id 6827787
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