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Don't know what I was worried about. BSC has shown time and time again that it could care less about my kids, and most likely about my exWH.

As an update to my "am I tough enough" post from last week, DD was performing yesterday at a huge event in a beautiful historical theatre. She's only 7 and this is the fourth time she's done it.

ExWH has never come before, but I think DD is finally old enough to where she asked and must have guilted him into coming to see her. He told me he was coming and I automatically thought that, because it was his visitation weekend and BSC's weekend with her kids too, that the whole lot of them would come to see DD perform. Anyway, that's what people involved in "blended" families usually do, right? Even if it's phony, they try to put on a show.

Nope.

ExWH got a ticket at the last minute so he didn't sit anywhere near me. I know he was there because he made a point to text right before she went on stage and said something about the stage that he would only know if he was there.

So, he gets a little credit for physically being there, but he also left early. He didn't stick around to see her come out of the theatre, hug her and give her some flowers. That was the sweetest part and, as with everything else, I took care of it.

DD actually didn't believe that he was there since hundreds of other dads were out there at the end. I had to convince her he was and that he had to leave, but was excited to pick her up for the rest of the weekend once we got her home, changed and cleaned up.

In any event, exWH barely made an effort, I don't know why I would ever believe that BSC would make one ounce of effort toward them. For me, selfishly, I'm glad that bitch never comes around. But, I'm sure, on some level, her lack of caring confuses and upsets my kids and makes them wonder why their father would ever want to be involved with someone like that. Those two are a dysfunctional, disgusting mess and it will forever boggle my mind that he left an intact home and the mother of his children only to throw his children into a loveless, trashy pile of crap that no one in the world would ever believe is a family.

I'm so glad BSC (don't know why, but that abbreviation makes me giggle wildly inside didn't show up!

I know what you mean about not understanding how WSs can give up a stable, calm environment with their children for utter chaos and dysfunction.

Part of my realization in my own situation is that WH is incapable of a healthy relationship, and when I pushed for/insisted on one, he became unhappy with me/our marriage.

I hope for your children's sake, and yours, that BSC fades into the distance and goes away one of these days.

Call me selfish, but when Dipshit doesn't come to the kids' events (even when they are on his weekends), I just tell myself it's a bonus for me. These are the sweet special times of childhood that disappear way too quickly. My kids know that I will always be there.

Well, I'm sorry that the douchebag hurts your kids with his lack of interest, but honestly, I think it's great that you can go see your kids in their events without the drama. I envy that. While I do enjoy myself at my kids' performances, it is still annoying to be forced to witness my ex and CommandOwife making a spectacle of themselves. At DD's most recent concert (which the stepsister was also in), they brought the girls flowers. If XWH had always been thoughtful that way, it wouldn't have bothered me a bit, but the man that I was married to would have thought that flowers for an elementary school concert (that neither of the girls had major solos or huge roles in) was extravagant. However, it's all part of the BIG SHOW that they have to put on so that they think they're impressing everyone with their caring and involvement (including themselves).

I'm glad that BSC knows her place. Tell her to pop on over to Rotting Acres and give CommandOwife a set of brains, would you? At least your XWH and BSC aren't hypocrites; they've behaved like trash, and they continue to act like trash. In many ways, that will make your life a lot easier, though again, I'm sorry that your kids will have to deal with it.

I knew she would not go. I would have been shocked if she did. She has never made any effort before. She is not going to start now.