When people show you who they really are, believe them - Maya Angelou
I've been a little down/disappointed in the effort my WH has been making. Although we are both in IC and MC and he will answer any questions I ask (less defensively as every day goes by) I still feel like he is not putting in the effort, for communication, for affection, for being proactive to figure out what was wrong with him. These were things I didn't need before because he showed me how much he loved me through his actions....but now I just don't know if what he can or is willing to do will ever be enough.
So the crazy thing is, I came into a significant (by my standards) chunk of $$ today. I have known this date would be coming for some time and based on our state property laws, if I didn't want to split it with him 50/50 then we would have had to separate 6 months ago. So six months ago I had to 'bet' on us making it. So now that date is here and we are 'making it' and I'm trying to figure out if I really screwed up. Because now I feel like there has been so much damage. I've suffered through everything since Dday and all of the additional TT and other character flaw discoveries and have to split the money too if we don't make it. Which would be an extra kick in the xss.
I just keep holding on that overall we are doing better each month and in the end, the pain, suffering, staying strong, (and now $$ too) will all be worth it.
BW: 42 (me) WH: 40 (him)
DDay 1 - 1/13
DDay2= 7/14 (False Recovery....Discovered CyberA was PA + Broken NC w/email during entire R)
Filed for Divorce 9/9/14: