Yesterday would have been my ninth wedding anniversary. The divorce was final just a few weeks ago, so I had hoped to make yesterday a much more memorable day than it was last year -- when my XWH, otherwise known as the Rat, spent at least half of our anniversary dinner talking on his cell phone and then as we were watching a movie later on left in the middle to 'see a guy about a car.' (Now I realize he probably left to see one of his girlfriends, but whatever)
I got up in the morning with a giant zit on my chin, tried to cover it up the best I could, dressed up and went to take care of some business before work. It was a disaster, so I went to work feeling flustered and irritated. The workday wasn't so great, and halfway through the day my shoe broke. I was wearing a very beautiful pair of red-and-tan suede heels, and my left shoe split open at the side. Walking from work to the parking garage was an adventure.
Finally, I went home after work to wait for a professional A/C repairman to come and fix my A/C because it was 106 degrees outside (A/C had been on the fritz since last week and a 'friend' who was supposed to fix it ended up bailing). He was supposed to come at 6pm, so I had hoped afterwards to treat myself to dinner out somewhere; however, he and his fellow repairman didn't show up until nearly 9pm, at which point I had already given up the idea of dinner out in despair. I ate some ham and cheese and crackers, turned on classical music and settled on my sofa with a book.
I didn't think I was going to think too much about my wedding day, but I did. My attention wandered a few times and I found myself walking sadly down memory lane, remembering how happy I was that day and what a good match we seemed to be. Little did I know what sick tendencies were lurking under the surface. I had to shake myself to stop thinking about it; I wished I hadn't spent the evening alone, but I had no choice because it was either be terribly hot or wait for the late repairmen.
By the time the repairmen came, I was just finishing up a workout which helped chase some of the marriage demons away. One good thing at least happened yesterday -- they fixed the A/C in about 15 minutes and it cost me the equivalent of $16 U.S. dollars.
Finally I took a shower and went to bed.
Happy anniversary to me.
When that day comes, do any of you think about the ghosts of anniversaries past or feel anything much? I really wanted to make it a great day, but everything went wrong until the end of it.