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Newest Member: Alone73 (46062)

User Topic: all about me.
dana47
♀ 43711
Member # 43711
Default  Posted: 11:30 AM, June 18th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm coming to fully embrace my affair was all about me. Isn't that what affairs are? Two selfish people giving into addictive behavior and their need for validation?

Posts: 56 | Registered: Jun 2014
BrokenButTrying
♀ 42111
Member # 42111
Default  Posted: 11:33 AM, June 18th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes. It was nothing to do with your BS, your M or your AP.

Now figure out why.


Me - 27
Him - 27
Madhatters

My Ddays - Jan 2010 & 12/04/14
His Dday - 23/12/13

Chin up. Unwavering. Fight. I can do this.


Posts: 1270 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: UK
DrJekyll
♂ 43618
Member # 43618
Default  Posted: 11:45 AM, June 18th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I totally agree. And now the work really starts.


I am no longer Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. I am me, and they are both part of me.

"If you don't eat the elephant in one bite, it might trample you while chewing"

ME: WH HER: BS (holesinmybucket)

I do not PM with Women


Posts: 903 | Registered: Jun 2014 | From: Midwest
SlowUptake
♂ 40484
Member # 40484
Default  Posted: 8:11 PM, June 18th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Two selfish people giving into addictive behavior and their need for validation?
Careful here, the idea that cheating is an addiction is avoiding responsibility.


Me:WS,50+
Her:BS,50+ (WantToWakeUp)
Married 33yrs
Dday Dec 2009

"Do not say a little in many words but a great deal in a few." Pythagoras

There are two kinds of people in the world.
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.


Posts: 390 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Limbo in Oz
pizzalover
♀ 38336
Member # 38336
Default  Posted: 1:56 PM, June 19th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Two selfish people giving into addictive behavior and their need for validation?
Careful here, the idea that cheating is an addiction is avoiding responsibility.

I want to disagree a little bit to this statement. My affair was definitely addictive behavior, but that doesn't mean I am not taking responsibility for my actions. There are many reasons that led me to have an affair, but I felt an addiction to the attention, etc made it hard for me to stop. I believe that the feel good chemicals released keep you wanting more. I don't blame my BH for my behaviors and I don't blame an addiction - I'm just telling you what it felt like for me, that I had a very difficult time stopping.

Sorry if I t/j this thread.


Trying to rebuild each day

Me - WW 39
Him - BH 40 (mpb1974)
2 Furrbabies - sweet cats

Met - 8/13/99
Started dating - 9/11/99
Moved in together - 3/03
Engaged - 6/5/09
Married - 8/21/10
D-Day - 1/24/13
Affair started 5/09


Posts: 530 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Pennsylvania
islesguy
♂ 38090
Member # 38090
Default  Posted: 12:42 PM, June 20th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree as well. It was completely selfish and all about me.


Me: WH
Father of 3 beautiful girls

* I am a RS (Recovering Scumbag)
* Do as I say, NOT as I did. :-(
* I acknowledge the grace I have received. I know do not deserve it.


Posts: 233 | Registered: Jan 2013
bionicgal
♀ 39803
Member # 39803
Default  Posted: 12:44 PM, June 20th (Friday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Someone here put it more eloquently than me:
"An affair is just two selfish fuc*ers, fuc*ing."


me - BS (45) - DDay - June 2013
A was 2+ months, EA/PA
In MC & Reconciling
"Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point to move forward." -- C.S. Lewis.

Posts: 2247 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 7

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