[This message edited by BreatheAgain10 at 7:19 PM, June 20th (Friday)]
Sorry for that tangent. All of that to say I am sorry you too are going through this. I wouldn't wish this on anyone. *hugs*
I am so sorry that you are going through such a great moment of your life in a sad period in your life.
NUMERO UNO: You and your baby!
No specific advice since I don't know each of your situations.
My thoughts are with you and wishing you an easy delivery!
STOP! H Just came in right now to inform me (as I'm typing this post) that his fine for the no seatbelt ticket he got is 11 times higher than he was sure it would be. Of course he's even more angry now. He's letting normal life issues/stresses affect us so bad. He got that fucking ticket two days after I jokingly warned him that he's gonna get a damn ticket for refusing to wear his seatbelt. He shouldn't be surprised but he comes in here just to rant about it. I finally just told him to man up and stop being a fucking baby already! I told him to quit his bitching already. Life and shit happens so deal with it without the fucking drama!
Ugh, sorry but I'd had enough taking his rudeness out on me!
OK, so this just make me realize that he's not gonna pull his crybaby head out of his ass anytime soon and I will probably more than likely have to go to the hospital without my sperm donating H
Ugh, what a shit storm his moods created... Perfect fucking timing!
Katiescarlett, I may have to ask a family member but am very embarrassed to have to give some reason to excuse my H's absence. I hate ppl in my life knowing what's going on.
Thank you for your kind words of support Ostrich!
So sorry you ladies are having a rough time and having stress added at such a special time.
Definitely the time to let go of the troubles of life. It's you and the babies right now. You're all very strong.
Keep focusing on those babies. Breathe. Think how beautiful they'll be and how great they'll smell when you're holding them.
Sending you strength and peace.
Friend, nurse, family, anybody who can talk to H to talk him out of current mindset and explain to him how important peace is for the safety of baby and you? The actual pre and birthing of a baby is heavy duty on one's health and survival.
I think getting some temporary distance, even walking to another room or outside to get your own space can lower the stress for even a few minutes can help.
Although I understand, try not to think too far into the future.
[This message edited by Thinkingtoomuch at 10:38 PM, June 20th (Friday)]
I was where you both are 9 months ago. It is such an insanely vulnerable time. Just keep thinking of the beautiful baby your are about to hold in your arms. Life may be extremely difficult right now, but I promise this baby will remind you what happiness is and help pull you through.
My sweet girl was an HB baby and the pregnancy was very stressful. I agree that a doula and/or supportive family members will help with the delivery. You have both done it before, just keep that in mind.
I'll be thinking of you both and wishing you peaceful deliveries.
One thing I wanted to jump in and tell you is about his 11x normal ticket he got. In most jurisdictions, that can be the convenience fee you pay for having the ability to pay it off and not dealing with going to court. BUT, if your H goes to court, pleads a good mea culpa to the judge, admits responsibility, and asks for a reduction to new baby or ??, the judge may likely reduce the fine. Even if he doesn't, the fine is likely to be less as much as that quoted on the ticket. I think you can call the court and ask what the fine is if he's found "guilty" or pleads "nolo contendere" in court and see if it's different. Here's a little explanation between the two:
Good luck, I hope you find peace with your delivery & have a healthy baby.
[This message edited by oldtimer97 at 4:20 PM, June 21st (Saturday)]
To save a marriage, you must be willing to lose the marriage.
[This message edited by BreatheAgain10 at 10:24 PM, June 21st (Saturday)]
I'd find that out if I were you. Whatever is causing him pain may be making him irritable. Or, the "pain pills" could be causing side effects that are distracting. Medications have tons of side effects that can be dismissed by unsuspecting people. I may be able to pinpoint some of this if you find out, as I'm a nurse. I understand if you don't want to divulge it to me, as I'm a stranger. A simple explanation could help tho.
I also wonder why he really doesn't want you to see them. Is this usual for him? Some pills are not really for pain, but can help pain by altering the way the body reacts, like antidepressants do this. Then that even adds to more conjecture about other side effects.
Sorry for the TMI. You can PM me if you want.
[This message edited by Thinkingtoomuch at 10:33 PM, June 21st (Saturday)]
If not tell the nurses when you get there that you will be alone. If at all possible they will try to have someone with you the whole time to give you support (staffing permitted). Or at least check in on your more often..
Sending you strength and comfort.. Congratulations on your new baby.
Leaning towards leaving, no one deserves this pain.
I delivered babies #4 and 5 alone. I'm happy to discuss via PM if you like.
While it can be done alone, sometimes the unexpected can happen and you really need someone with you. Its scary enough when it does and to be alone is doubly so. You need someone at this time who can support you physically and emotionally. If thats WH, great. If not, do you have a friend that yo can count on?