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Newest Member: Brokeninnm38 (61788)

User Topic: lesson in boundaries from a marker...
♀ 39005
Member # 39005
Default  Posted: 7:04 PM, June 24th (Tuesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I went to see a client today and her grandmother showed me the shirt the little girl had been wearing during one of our last was a brand new shirt that she had worn once...the shirt now has a blue stain on it from the markers we had colored with during our last visit.

The grandmother asked me if my agency could give her some type of reimbursement for the shirt...I explained no we don't, and apologized deeply for the ruined shirt, and made a mental note to only use washable markers from this point on.

Had this happened last year I would have either given her my own money or gone out and bought a new shirt for the client....probably the same one. Now I still feel badly about the shirt, but realize that buying a new shirt would be breaking boundaries....

Maybe I am making some progress...

But what if I fall?
Oh Darling, but what if you fly?

Posts: 1269 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Massachusetts
♂ 42047
Member # 42047
Default  Posted: 7:52 AM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good job.

It seems like a little thing. But we need to make sure we don't even start step one on some of the roads that used to get us into trouble.

Maybe someday that will be different, but now is not that time.

Me: WH (40s)
DDay 11/03/13
In MC and IC

Posts: 911 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Pennsylvania
♀ 36853
Member # 36853
Default  Posted: 7:54 PM, June 25th (Wednesday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I definitely see the progress. I'm another one who would have replaced the shirt.

My BH says I'm a KISA. I'm trying to work on those tendencies but boy they run deep and sometimes healthy boundaries feel like rudeness or uncaring when I try them out even though I don't see it that way on someone else.

fWW 40s, BH 40s
D-day 27 Aug 2012. Kids 25, 17, 13. 2 dogs.

I edit often to fix stuff ☺️

Profoundly grateful Every. Single. Day. that I am blessed with an H with strength, integrity, and compassion, and that he decided to try.

Posts: 1814 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Deep South, USA
♀ 37826
Member # 37826
Default  Posted: 4:46 PM, June 26th (Thursday), 2014View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's not a little thing, it's a BIG thing. Congratulations! I was/am also a Knight in Shining Armor/Rescuer in both my personal and (former) professional life, and it can be tremendously hard work both to notice when I am doing it and to stop.

Me, fWW
Him, fBH
Dday, 12/22/2010
I use capital letters for emphasis, not yelling.
Reconciled and healing.

Posts: 169 | Registered: Dec 2012
Topic Posts: 4

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