I am down in the dumps.
WH NEVER wants sex...and its getting to me. I already feel worthless and ugly and fat and not sexy because he had an A, but now he never wants to have sex. I try....but no. The past couples times he has made faces when I suggest it. Last night I tried again, but no. Its really starting to get to me and my self image and self worth.
So last night while we lay in bed....WH tells me that he wants a wedding ring?!
When we first got married I bought him one, engraved on the inside "Heartbroken2012 & WH forever", but since I had to buy it while he was in England it was a little big. He wore it tho....he wore it up until he worked at my work (where he met the OW). He said he couldnt wear it because of the gloves etc.
He had an A.
After he confessed, he bought me a new ring "to symbolize a new beginning and to show how he is committed to me and loves me"....I guess he wanted to prove to me him fucking another woman was over.
And my condition was...he get one to and WEAR IT. Well its been 2 years and he still doesnt wear one, and every time I bring it up he says we dont have the money.
So now he wants one.
I am just so tired of feeling this way, and a lot of people have offered up the idea of D, and I just cant. DESPITE everything, I still love him and knew he was the ONE the moment we met. I love him, but I am so heartbroken. I still cant accept what he did, and I am so hurt by it. And now him not wanting sex just makes me feel horrible about myself. I used to feel special that he chose me and I was the ONLY american he wanted and had been with.
My feelings of this havent changed in 2 years.
Im just down in the dumps. Always.