I have a 14 and an 11 also.
They were 8 and 11 on dday.
I have been the constant for the kids- the Doosh left and I stayed. They know that I will answer questions honestly. I will tell them age appropriate information. They can count on that from me.
I also let them know ALL the time that I can take care of us, and we are going to be fine. They don't need to worry about where we will live, school, food, safety, etc. those were the major concerns my kids had.
I spent a lot of time sad, and let them see that I was sad. The were sad too. But also made sure we had fun together making new things happen.
All of my kids know the truth now about the affair.