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Triggersville!! Took me by surprise.

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watersofavalon posted 7/1/2014 14:21 PM

Almost exactly 2 yrs since Dday. Been up and down but mostly up recently. We are doing reasonably well. I thought we were nearly there.... Which is why I was so shocked by my reaction to a stupid tv programme on Sunday. Man in an affair for several years and his wife found out - he was happy to leave her and their 4 kids for ow. So what? It's just a tv drama! But boy I triggered hard! Shouting at the tv, crying, sobbing. H was actually scared to touch me. I was so embarrassed at myself. Where did that come from? I thought I was over that stuff

sisoon posted 7/1/2014 17:50 PM

But boy I triggered hard!

Gently, that makes perfect sense to me. The nature of triggers is that they sneak up on you and bite. Your response is (probably) just residual pain coming out.


hopefull77 posted 7/1/2014 18:34 PM

Tv innocent culprits....this stuff didn't use to bother me....but that was then and this now....
we are going to a screening of a movie called 'The Song' next week....based on the story of Solomon....we watched the trailor today....oh boy it's got infidelity in it I'm sure...but we know it and we are going anyway...I will be eating popcorn with butter and process my way through it!

Skan posted 7/1/2014 19:22 PM

Hey there. I'm over my 2 year mark, and right now, my FWH has a bruise on his arm that is almost healed, because my PTSD got triggered wildly and in trying to escape, I went by, actually through, him so hard that I bruised his arm. For which I apologized profusely when my sanity returned. The nature of triggers is that they hit you hard from out of no-where. Hopefully, you were able to process it and the next time, you won't trigger so hard. I know that we had a long heart-to-heart talk after my trigger to figure out how to handle things if that flares up again. And we were both able to figure out exactly what triggered me, so we've made some changes in our lives that will hopefully minimize the likelihood of this happening again. (((hugs)))

brkn_heartd posted 7/1/2014 20:15 PM

Triggers have a way of taking us by surprise. Sometimes it is something that is so obscure you may even ask why it caused a trigger. I am starting my 5th year and still have triggers. From what you explained, I am not surprised it caused a trigger. I am JUST now able to start listening to music due to triggers. Have patience with yourself. It is part of the roller coaster.

Hugs to you.

mbbd posted 7/1/2014 20:45 PM

The triggers that you don't see coming hit me harder all the time. I can anticipate something hitting me hard like a place or time that relates to a fact of the affair. I think you may have been especially upset because it derailed what your plans were for relaxing and it just sucks that you have to deal with this. I get it. It was good that you let it out.

watersofavalon posted 7/2/2014 03:45 AM

Thanks for your replies

Weird thing is I am still upset by it - when I think about it my heart speeds up and I feel sick. I apologised to H later - he doesn't deserve that now after all that time and work he has done. He replied that he was the one who should be apologising every day.

When I was crying he came over to put his arms around me but he said i was scared to as you were shouting and so angry. I told him I wasn't shouting at him but his reply was 'yes you were'. And he was right I guess. I was just shouting at anyone and everyone who had ever done this to anyone else.

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