Ok rambling. I have a feeling I'll be on a lot tonight. I think I'm gonna plan a girls karaoke night this week.
And guess what, HE is replaceable too.
You and your child deserve so much better, and believe me better does exist.
Wish you the best!
4 kids all adults.
Married 22+ years.
I have moved on and life is good!
I know how you feel. I really do.
You are not replaceable!
A step parent is never, ever the same as flesh and blood. If you and your children are lucky the OW will be nice, a sympathetic adult, a responsible sitter, maybe a teacher - but never your children's mother.
Besides which, she won't last. You will be your children's rock and protector. You can do this. I know it is hard, but it will get better.
32 - I wish I was 32. You're a baby, you life is still ahead of you.
Our self esteem takes such a beating after being abandoned/ rejected, I'm praying for healing for you. I think you're doing a very good thing for yourself to plan that karaoke night. Don't forget to sing "Hold on " by Wilson Phillips, "Nothing Broken" by Celine Dion , "Survivor" by Destiny's child, "Problem" by Iggy, "I will survive" ,"He wasn't man enough" by Tony Braxton, and "Set Fire to the Rain" by Adele.
And I have to correct you, dear Numb, HE IS THE ONE WHO IS REPLACEABLE.
The betrayal and sense of abandonment is overwhelming. I know how earth-shattering it is.
It helped me to remain focused, as much as I could, to helping my kids through this nightmare. Their world has been shattered too and they need you. They will feel abandoned too. Your WH is a fool if he thinks you are "replaceable" but don't ever believe you are. As written above, you are NEVER replaceable to your kids. They need you. You will be their rock. You are the one they know won't abandon them. Be there for them and take care of yourself first and foremost.
You deserve better than a serial cheater and I know you know that! Your kids deserve a better role model. I know that doesn't make this pain any easier. It just plain sucks. I am so sorry he's turned into such a jerk. It's so very hard to wrap your mind around, I know.
Please be good to yourself. You are a wonderful person. Remember that!!!!! He does not define you!
He's moving in with her. My children will be exposed to her. I will have to drive to "their" place together. I was replaceable.
If you throw away the steak on your plate and put some dog shit on there instead, you have "replaced" the steak. Doesn't mean it's a good idea, doesn't mean the steak should blame itself. The steak is still a steak. Unique, perfect. The dog shit is still dog shit. He may have "replaced" you but sooner or later he's going to ask himself why his life stinks and why everything tastes suspiciously like shit.
Everyone is "replaceable". His loss, your gain. Congratulations, your life now has one less loser in it. All that's happened is that the dog shit has been scraped from your plate. One day you'll wake up and realise that the air is a little fresher in your world. Once you have your life back on the rails you may find a new steak yourself.
[This message edited by LonelyHusband at 4:27 PM, July 2nd (Wednesday)]
The guy is a serial cheater. Period.
The mistake many OW make is thinking that they're so damned special that he'd NEVER cheat on them. You'd be amazed at how many of them find out quite differently.
As I always say, when a man ends up with his other woman, she leaves a vacancy.
Sit back, grab some popcorn, and watch the show. It may happen right away, it may not be 2 months from now or a year from now. But it will happen. He's still the same lying cheater he always was and eventually, he'll do the same to her.