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Please no more idk

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mattolivia posted 7/2/2014 20:53 PM

She keeps saying she doesn't know why she cheated. she doesn't know whats going on in her head.

Badhurt posted 7/2/2014 20:58 PM

She has done this to you twice now. Unless you want to live with it, the why is her problem not yours.

What she is doing is not uncommon. She did it because she has no personal boundaries and because she wanted to. And she is a repeat offender.

You have to make you own decision, but she is regretful she got caught, period.

mattolivia posted 7/2/2014 21:01 PM

it crazy she remembers him using protection but can't remember if she took her ring off.

Badhurt posted 7/2/2014 21:03 PM

She banged him. Why does it matter if her ring was on or off. Would it make you feel better if she banged him with the ring on???

You need to get tested for STD. You can also thank her for that.

craig2001 posted 7/2/2014 22:10 PM

She keeps saying she doesn't know why she cheated. she doesn't know whats going on in her head.
Tell her she needs to start getting some answers. And she needs therapy.

I dont know is the favorite answer of people who really do know the answer, but they dont want you to know the answer.

NeverAgain2013 posted 7/3/2014 06:33 AM

I agree with Badhurt. She's a repeat offender and did it again because she wanted to. Some people just need to have excitement in their lives. There doesn't always have to be some deep, dark psychological reason for everything people do.

Are you going to forgive her again?

And don't believe the bull-crap story about them using protection. Get a full STD screening and make sure SHE gets one as well.

Splitter posted 7/3/2014 11:20 AM

My ex-fiancé "doesn't know why she did it" either. She also says she "panicked". Basically, she wanted to fuck this guy a bunch, and figured she wouldn't get caught, so why not? First time she ever cheated on me, she was deeply sorry she got caught. Second time she was deeply sorry for the pain she caused me - for about a week. Now she has moved on to being deeply sorry for herself, because she got caught, and is alone.

[This message edited by Splitter at 11:22 AM, July 3rd (Thursday)]

Lucky2HaveMe posted 7/3/2014 13:57 PM

it crazy she remembers him using protection but can't remember if she took her ring off.

She remembers. She doesn't want to tell you. Honestly, does it matter? If she left it on, that sucks. If she took it off, that sucks.

And she doesn't know why she did it because she hasn't truly peeled back her layers to get to her core being. Until she does that, it will remain a mystery to everyone and the cycle will rinse/repeat.

I don't know your story, others say this is her 2nd time? Did she do any work on herself through IC before? You need to determine what your requirements for R will be - if you are considering R - and what the consequences will be if she does not meet them. You don't have to do that right now, but that's the thought process you need to begin with yourself.

confused615 posted 7/3/2014 14:08 PM

Chances are, there was no protection used. Please get tested for STD'S.


She did it because she is selfish, because she could, and because th last time it was rugswept, so she had very little consequences.

What are you doing differently this time?

Yakamishi posted 7/3/2014 22:12 PM

I did get better. But...

Get used to the IDKs. I still get that after two years.

Looooong road.

WinterBranch posted 7/3/2014 23:27 PM

You may never get a different response. My ex betrayed me with MOW, spent all the cash out of our business, and ran up my personal credit. All I get is IDK from him...

Please release your expectation of a defense, because there is none.

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