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Divorce/Separation :
11's great week

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 Pass (original poster member #38122) posted at 3:31 AM on Thursday, July 3rd, 2014

While my sweet little boy, 11, has been far less vocal about how he hates living with his mom during the week, he keeps saying that when he turns 14 he wants to move in here permanently and go to high school in the city.

All this week, he has been living here while he goes to Science Camp at the nearby university. It has been great! I just love having him around. He has ADHD, and often has problems relating to other kids - I think they find his superfocus/nonfocus a little hard to take by times. Sometimes I even find it difficult.

On his first day of camp, I was telling his instructor about his ADHD, but said that he has no problem paying attention when it's something he is interested in. She confided that she also has ADHD and was ONLY interested in science as a kid, so she totally understands. I felt like I was leaving him in good hands. He gave me a fantastic smile when I said, "Have a good day at university", as I left.

When I picked him up. THREE kids said, "See ya later, 11!" Better yet, the next morning as I dropped him off, they called him over to the table they were sitting at. I can't remember the last time I felt so happy! 11 has found his people: Future Science Geeks!

And he even excitedly told me, "I'm the only white kid in my group!" That's something that wouldn't happen in the village his mom lives in.

But here's the part where I get to be selfishly happy: He was talking about a section of town that one of his new friends lives in. It's not far from our apartment. 11 said, "So I told him that he lives near where I live!"

I've always worried that this apartment seems like a place my boys visit, in contrast to their "home" with The Princess. It warmed my heart when he says he lives here. I'm not trying to compete with the other house - it would just be great if this place had somewhat equal standing! It looks like it may have!

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6858530
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littlefoggy ( member #41429) posted at 3:35 AM on Thursday, July 3rd, 2014

As a current science geek, it is wonderful to finally find a place among like minded people. Especially after being around people who don't get you or your dorky jokes.

Yay for an awesome week!

Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13
Divorcing

posts: 505   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2013
id 6858538
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Violated ( member #21239) posted at 6:54 AM on Thursday, July 3rd, 2014

That's heartwarming, I needed that, thanks.

So happy for both of you. Your a good dad Pass.

Divorced 10/2013

posts: 742   ·   registered: Oct. 14th, 2008   ·   location: West Coast
id 6858677
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sparkysable ( member #3703) posted at 1:53 PM on Thursday, July 3rd, 2014

So now he kind of has neighborhood friends? I'd say that's a good sign. Maybe he could even have playdates with his new friend?

D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.

posts: 5718   ·   registered: Mar. 8th, 2004   ·   location: NY
id 6858844
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Gemini71 ( member #40115) posted at 2:36 PM on Thursday, July 3rd, 2014

I understand the joy of seeing your child "find their people." My oldest is ADHD w/Aspurgers, total science and Manga/Anime geek. See's like an alien to your average suburban high schooler, but when she visits the mother ship...

I also get the part about your place being "home" for them. What he's really saying is that you are home! That's all about where they feel safe and loved.

DSs 21, 16, 12
About my Ex:
IDK
IDC
IDGAF

Double Betrayal D-Day 7/26/2013
Divorced 11/18/2014

posts: 3406   ·   registered: Jul. 30th, 2013   ·   location: Illinois, USA
id 6858904
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 Pass (original poster member #38122) posted at 3:04 AM on Friday, July 4th, 2014

I also get the part about your place being "home" for them. What he's really saying is that you are home! That's all about where they feel safe and loved.

Thanks, Gem. I like thinking of it that way!

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6859980
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badmedicine ( member #41692) posted at 5:33 AM on Friday, July 4th, 2014

We science geeks can be very accepting of others

"The wishbone will never replace the backbone." -Will Henry
"This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it." -Dorothy Parker

posts: 211   ·   registered: Dec. 17th, 2013   ·   location: United States
id 6860074
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